Jokes

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My wife has requested that when I'm receiving a blow job she would appreciate it if I told her when I'm about to come.

Do you think that I should phone her, or would a text suffice?
 
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A true friend is like a penis, he stands up for you in times of need. A genuine friend is like a bra, she supports you at all times. A faithful friend is like a condom , he protects you from all harm. A loving friend is like a vagina, she accomodates you fully despite the size of your problem.

⭕1. Kamasutra says : If you suck one nipple, the woman herself offers the other one. And that was the origin of "buy one get one free"!

⭕2. Did you ever notice: everything on a woman's upper body starts with a "B". Blouse, Bra, Bikini, Boobs & lower body with a "P" Peticoat, panties, ... That's origin of "BP"!

⭕3. Before sex, you help each other get naked. After sex, you dress only yourself. Moral: In life no one helps you once you're f..ked.

⭕4. Success is like pregnancy. Everybody congratulates you but nobody knows how many times you got ****ed to achieve it.

⭕5. Life is like a dick, sometimes it becomes hard for no reason.

⭕6. Practical thought: A husband is supposed to make his wife's panties wet, not her eyes. A wife is supposed to make her husband's dick hard, not his life..!

⭕When a lady is pregnant,
all her friends touch her stomach ad say "Congrats!".
But none of them come and touch the man's Penis and say "Well done!".
 
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A man goes to a fancy dress party carrying a girl on his back
He rings the bell, and the hostess answers to door. She asks him what he has come as
"A snail" replies the man
"Oh" says the hostess, "and who is that lady on your back?"
"That's Michelle" says the man.
 
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Poly said:
Really ?

How and in what way ?
This make none......................fine English in your own words 9894#



If you want to be a grammar Nazi, consider the lack of a period in your last.
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look **** off and bother someone else, your jokes are **** your patter is **** I've left you alone, just **** off to where you're wanted if you can find such a place
 
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2 pennth said:
Who the xxxx do you think you are talking to <laugh><diva>
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That ****er spoiling the Jokes page i haven't bothered him , he pulls up grammar, on my jokes without checking his own grammar, needs to **** off and get a chutney dip off his boyfriend, Now you can give him 2 penneth worth mate the floor's all yours but add a joke in so it doesn't disrupt the page[please]
 
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