Jokes
- Thread starter ellandback
- Start date
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My mate took his Grandad to one of those fancy Health Spas, where tiny little fish eat all the dead skin.
It cost him £35, but it was a lot cheaper than a funeral.
It cost him £35, but it was a lot cheaper than a funeral.
New
"A Japanese man walked into the currency exchange in New York City with 5000 yen and walked out with $72.
The following week, he walked in with another 5000 yen, and was handed $66.
He asked the teller why he got less money that week than the previous week.
The teller said, "Fluctuations."
The Japanese man stormed out, and just before slamming the door, turned around and shouted, "Fluc you Amelicans, too!"
"A Japanese man walked into the currency exchange in New York City with 5000 yen and walked out with $72.
The following week, he walked in with another 5000 yen, and was handed $66.
He asked the teller why he got less money that week than the previous week.
The teller said, "Fluctuations."
The Japanese man stormed out, and just before slamming the door, turned around and shouted, "Fluc you Amelicans, too!"
I think I have told you all before, NEVER get close or friendly with a woman with a small mouth.
Small mouth = nasty ****ers.
Check around people you know, it’s true.
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I'll never forget how happy i was when i saw my missus walking down the aisle towards me...
..., My heart was beating so fast and the expectation was unbearable. It seemed to take so long but eventually there she was, stood beside me. I gave her a cheeky wink and said, 'get that ****ing trolley over here they're doing three crates of Grolsch for the price of two!!!!
..., My heart was beating so fast and the expectation was unbearable. It seemed to take so long but eventually there she was, stood beside me. I gave her a cheeky wink and said, 'get that ****ing trolley over here they're doing three crates of Grolsch for the price of two!!!!
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If it takes 10 white men 5 days to dig a ditch 20 yards long and 2 metres deep how long would it take 8 men of colour to dig the same ditch. And if 50% of the workforce in each case was comprised of women how long would the same job take. If all the workforce in each case were transgender how long would the same job take ?
I knew I was in trouble when my Irish kidnapper removed the blindfold.
Maybe I should have escaped while he was still wearing it.
Maybe I should have escaped while he was still wearing it.
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