You must log in or register to see images
Jokes
- Thread starter ellandback
- Start date
-
Please bear with us on the new site integration and fixing any known bugs over the coming days. If you can not log in please try resetting your password and check your spam box. If you have tried these steps and are still struggling email [email protected] with your username/registered email address
-
During our day at the lake, my mate asked, "What's the biggest fish you've ever caught?"
"Have you ever seen the film Jaws?"
"Yeah."
"Well it was about the same size as the box the DVD comes in."
"Have you ever seen the film Jaws?"
"Yeah."
"Well it was about the same size as the box the DVD comes in."
nice one
know what you mean i was drooling like i was senileI had to turn it off
2020VisionofLeeds
Well-Known Member
at least it wasn't a female dripping for a BBC hope you can work that one out.....
You must log in or register to see images
It's our 30th anniversary today so I said to my wife.. Do you like Paris?
Yes she replied, excitedly
Do you like Barcelona?
Yes she replied almost in tears of joy.
I said.. Good, get some beers in the fridge. PSG v Barca is on TV at 7pm.
Yes she replied, excitedly
Do you like Barcelona?
Yes she replied almost in tears of joy.
I said.. Good, get some beers in the fridge. PSG v Barca is on TV at 7pm.
A young Jarrow woman was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the sea but just before she could throw herself from the wharf, a handsome young man stopped her.
"You have so much to live for," said the man. "I'm a sailor and we are off to Australia tomorrow. I can stow you away on my ship. I'll take care of you, bring you food every day and keep you happy."
With nothing to lose and the prospect of going to Australia, the woman accepted. That night the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a small but comfortable compartment in the hold. From then on every night he would bring her three sandwiches, a bottle of red wine and make love to her until dawn.
Two weeks later she was discovered by the captain during a routine inspection. "What are you doing here?" asked the captain.
"I have an arrangement with one of the sailors," she replied. "He brings me food and I get a free trip to Australia."
"I see," the captain says.
Her conscience got the best of her and she added, "Plus, he's screwing me."
"He certainly is," replied the captain. "This is the Hull to Rotterdam ferry."
"You have so much to live for," said the man. "I'm a sailor and we are off to Australia tomorrow. I can stow you away on my ship. I'll take care of you, bring you food every day and keep you happy."
With nothing to lose and the prospect of going to Australia, the woman accepted. That night the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a small but comfortable compartment in the hold. From then on every night he would bring her three sandwiches, a bottle of red wine and make love to her until dawn.
Two weeks later she was discovered by the captain during a routine inspection. "What are you doing here?" asked the captain.
"I have an arrangement with one of the sailors," she replied. "He brings me food and I get a free trip to Australia."
"I see," the captain says.
Her conscience got the best of her and she added, "Plus, he's screwing me."
"He certainly is," replied the captain. "This is the Hull to Rotterdam ferry."