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Jokes

Discussion in 'Leeds United' started by ellandback, Jun 25, 2019.

  1. OLOF

    OLOF Well-Known Member

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  2. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    please log in to view this image
     
    #7722
  3. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    #7723
  4. 2020VisionofLeeds

    2020VisionofLeeds Well-Known Member

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    A bit unfair to mock Shaks like this
     
    #7724
  5. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    Three desperately ill men go to their doctor seeking help.
    One is an alcoholic, one is a chain smoker and the other is gay.
    The doctor tells the men that if they indulge in any of their bad habits again they will die.
    The three men leave.
    The alcoholic sees a pub and hears it's loud music and can't resist. He orders a shot of whisky, drinks it, and suddenly drops down dead.
    The other two walk outside realising how serious this is.
    The chain smoker sees a half cigarette on the ground still burning, so the gay lad says to the chain smoker "If you bend over to pick that up, were both dead."
     
    #7725
  6. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    This bloke in the pub said to me,
    "F*ck me, that was a rough old bitch you were with last night, not a patch on the women I normally see you with, what on Earth ever possessed to take her out? "
    "I had to, " I replied, "it was our wedding anniversary.
     
    #7726

  7. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    #7727
  8. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    #7728
  9. OLOF

    OLOF Well-Known Member

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  10. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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  11. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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  12. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    #7732
    oldschool likes this.
  13. oldschool

    oldschool Well-Known Member

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    at the doctors discussing weight loss and he happened to mention that during sex it was possible to burn as many calories as an eight mile run...no way can you run that far in 90 seconds
     
    #7733
  14. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    #7734
    stonkin and Gessa like this.
  15. Gessa

    Gessa Well-Known Member

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    Found out today my grief counsellor has died, he was great at his job, so I don't give a ****
     
    #7735
    OLOF, stonkin and Makemstine Roger like this.
  16. stonkin

    stonkin Well-Known Member

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    I wonder if the woman at 1:11 got a couple of shiners:)
     
    #7736
    Makemstine Roger likes this.
  17. oldschool

    oldschool Well-Known Member

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    An ad popped up on my phone ' hairpieces £5'.... thought that's not a bad price toupee
     
    #7737
  18. brisbane-lion

    brisbane-lion Well-Known Member

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    That;s not funny, it's bloody cruel! (I'm going to hell :emoticon-0130-devil) <laugh><laugh><laugh><laugh>
     
    #7738
    Makemstine Roger likes this.
  19. OLOF

    OLOF Well-Known Member

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  20. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    never knew he was into bestiality
     
    #7740

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