An Englishman, Irishman and & Scotsman walk into a pub. The landlord says: "Is this some sort of joke?"
Paul McCartney has already fallen out with his new wife, Apparently she's spent twice as much on shoes as the last one.
Bloke walks into a pub and orders a pint. He looks around and notices three ducks drinking at a table. He walks over and asks if he could join them. "That's fine" said the first duck. "What's your name?" asked the man. "Huey" said the first duck. Man: "Had a nice day then?" Huey: "Yeah not bad, ate some bread, in and out of puddles so can't complain" "What's your name?" the man asked the second duck. "Louie" he said. Man: "You had a good day aswell?" Louie: "Can't grumble, went to the park, in and out of puddles and stuff so ok". The man turns to the third duck and says: "I suppose you're Dooey?" The third duck says: "No, i'm Puddles so **** off!"
