Off Topic Jokes thread
- Thread starter devonFRATTONiser
- Start date
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A carpenter put some decorative trim in my house, halfway up the wall.
I thought it would take all weekend but he did it in a dado.....
I thought it would take all weekend but he did it in a dado.....
I just phoned up to order some incontinence pants....
They asked where I was ringing from.
I told them the waist down..
They asked where I was ringing from.
I told them the waist down..
I saw a bloke at the gym on an exercise bike, wearing a helmet.
So I put on a life jacket-and got on the rowing machine next to him!
So I put on a life jacket-and got on the rowing machine next to him!
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I was trying to get home in time for the football the other night, but I was being held up by a learner driver.
She was driving really slowly and kept stalling. "Come on you stupid tw*t!" I shouted. "Get a f*cking move on!"
She started crying and said it would be her last lesson with me!
She was driving really slowly and kept stalling. "Come on you stupid tw*t!" I shouted. "Get a f*cking move on!"
She started crying and said it would be her last lesson with me!
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