A man checks into his hotel on a business trip and, feeling a bit lonely, he thought, I'll call one of those girls you see advertised in phone booths when you're calling for a cab. He looked in a phone booth near the hotel and found an ad for a girl calling herself Veronique, a lovely girl, bending over in the photo. She had all the right curves in all the right places, beautiful long wavy hair, long graceful legs..... well, you get the picture! He copied the phone number and returned to his hotel when back in the room he figures, what the heck, give her a call. 'Hello,' the woman says......... God, she sounded sexy. 'Hi, I hear you give a great massage and I'd like you to come to my room and give me one. No, wait, I should be straight with you. I'm in town all alone and what I really want is sex. I want it hot, and I want it now. Bring implements, toys, rubber, leather, whips, everything you've got in your bag of tricks. We'll go hot and heavy all night; tie me up, cover me in chocolate syrup and whipped cream, anything you want! Now, how does that sound?' She says, 'That sounds fantastic, but you need to press 9 for an outside line.
please log in to view this image Come to the Northern Territory it will be fun they said "Pigs Arse"we replied. Wildlife rangers in the Top End have caught a 4.4-metre, 350-kilogram saltwater crocodile in an area frequented by tourists. Key points: Katherine rangers have trapped their biggest crocodile of the year The saltwater croc was caught at a tourist area 120 kilometres south of Katherine Local rangers say the 4.4-metre croc is the biggest trapped in Flora River in five years The massive male croc was trapped in the Flora River Nature Park, about 120 kilometres south-west of Katherine, last Friday and local rangers say it is the biggest to be caught in the Flora River in at least five years. "The tourists walk down to the river in the area where he was," Katherine senior wildlife ranger John Burke said.
A polar bear asked his dad if he was sure he was a polar bear. Dad said he was and asked why he asked. "Cos I'm f**k**g freezing" A son asked his father, "Dad are we pyromaniacs?" The father replied, "Yes we arson."
