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Off Topic Jokes thread

Discussion in 'Portsmouth' started by devonFRATTONiser, Jan 25, 2015.

  1. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    #13741
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  2. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Someone looked at me in Asda today, and shouted "SIX FEET !!!"

    I replied "6' 2", but good guess"
     
    #13742
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  3. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #13743
  4. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #13744
  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    2020 Holiday Photos

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    #13745
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  6. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    I went into a caravan showroom the other day and said to the salesman:

    "I'd like to buy a motorhome."

    He said "Camper?"

    I said "Oooo, get you, I'd like to buy a motorhome, sweety."
     
    #13746
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  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    I've just watched a TV programme about tomato growing.

    It was on one of the ketchup channels.
     
    #13747
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  8. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #13748
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  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #13749
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  10. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    #13750
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  11. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    #13751
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  12. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    #13752
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  13. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    #13753
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  14. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    #13754
  15. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    #13755
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  16. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    #13756
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  17. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    #13757
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  18. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    #13758
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  19. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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  20. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    Three cowboys are sitting around a campfire telling stories of their bravado.
    Tom, the hand from Wyoming, says, “I must be the strongest, meanest, toughest cowboy there is. The other day a bull got loose in the corral. It gored six men before I wrestled it to the ground by the horns with my bare hands and castrated that sucker with my teeth.”
    Ben, from Idaho, can’t stand to be bested. “That’s nothing. I was walking down the trail yesterday, and a 15-foot diamondback rattler slid out from under a rock and made a move for me. I grabbed that bastard with my bare hands, bit off its head, sucked the poison down in one gulp, and didn’t even get a bellyache.”
    Old Snake River Frank, the cowboy from Texas, remains silent, slowly stoking the campfire coals with his penis.
     
    #13760
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