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Off Topic Jokes thread
- Thread starter devonFRATTONiser
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What’s the difference between a golf ball and a Mercedes?
Tiger Woods can drive a golf ball 300 yards without hitting a tree.
Tiger Woods can drive a golf ball 300 yards without hitting a tree.
A man walks into the British Parliament office, says to the receptionist: -
"I would like to put my name forward for the forthcoming elections to be an Independent M.P."
The receptionist replied "Certainly sir. Please fill in this form.''
He was filling the form OK until he came to the question - ''Are you circumcised..?''
So he asked the receptionist - "Is that question necessary.?"
She replied... "If you are circumcised you are not eligible"
He asked what difference it would make if he was circumcised..?
She replied...."To become a British Member of Parliment you have to be a complete prick..!
"I would like to put my name forward for the forthcoming elections to be an Independent M.P."
The receptionist replied "Certainly sir. Please fill in this form.''
He was filling the form OK until he came to the question - ''Are you circumcised..?''
So he asked the receptionist - "Is that question necessary.?"
She replied... "If you are circumcised you are not eligible"
He asked what difference it would make if he was circumcised..?
She replied...."To become a British Member of Parliment you have to be a complete prick..!
FOR QUEEN AND ..............!
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Fellas, if you only need to buy cucumbers from the supermarket. Always buy a jar of Vaseline too. Stops the cashier thinking you’re Vegan.
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Weather's better and some are reported to have fled the cave...
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