Three women have just entered heaven, and are standing in front of an angel and St. Peter to find out what kinds of special privileges they'll have while there. He says to the women, "I only have one question. Have you lived a chaste life?" The first woman answers "I have only had sex with one man, my husband. And our first time was on our wedding night." St. Peter turns to the angel and says "Ah, a woman who has lived as God intended, and certainly deserving of reward. Give her a key to the golden room." The second woman says, "I have never known a man's touch. I was a nun, and stayed in the sisterhood since I was only a young lass." St. Peter turned to the angel and said "Truly exceptional, a woman who has gone above and beyond in service of God. Give her a key to the platinum room!" The third woman says "I've screwed 239 dudes: 67 before I met my husband, 35 while we were dating, 12 while we were engaged, 78 while we were married and 46 after he died." St. Peter stood stunned for a second, then leaned over to the angel and whispered, "Give her a key to my room."
Glorious Insults......................... I’m not insulting you, I’m describing you. Don’t you get tired of putting makeup on your two faces every morning?
While I'm at it.......... .I’m glad to see you’re not letting education get in the way of your ignorance. I’m jealous of all the people who haven’t met you.
