So I rang my mate Stan this morning and his wife answered. "I wanted to wish you and Stan a good holiday," I said. "You fly from Gatwick tomorrow, don't you?" She said, "Stansted." "Blimey," I said, "he seemed absolutely fine in the pub last night."
Just tried some of Elvis Costello's new Mediterranean sausages. They were delicious. I think olive salami is here to stay…
The woman at the Job Centre said, "You're always late, you ignore the queue of people and you're rude to everyone." I said, "What's your point?" "Have you ever thought of becoming a bus driver?" She replied
During the Covid lockdown, if you had family round on Christmas Day, Police could force entry to your home and make them go home. Does anybody know if this service is still available and if you have to book?
**********POLITE NOTICE ********** To people who have Christmas lights flashing blue on their houses/trees, can you please remove them? Every time I pass, I think it's the police and I have to let my foot off the accelerator, slam on my brakes, put my seat belt on, throw my mobile phone on the floor, hide my bottle of Smirnoff , swallow my joint and hide my gun. Thank you for your understanding.:
