Paddy and Murphy, we're going back to Paddy's house, after leaving the pub. 3am they arrive at the door, greeted by Paddy's wife, with a rolling pin in her hand. Murphy says. "One hell of a woman you've got there. Not many women would be up, baking at this time of the morning."
The Black Bra I had lunch with 2 of my unmarried friends. One is engaged, one is a mistress and I, the third one, have been married for 20 years. We were chatting about our relationships and decided to amaze our men by greeting them at the door wearing a black bra, stiletto heels and a mask over our eyes. We agreed to meet in a few days to exchange notes. Here’s how it all went. My engaged friend: The other night when my boyfriend came over he found me with a black leather bodice, tall stilettos, and a mask. He saw me and said, ‘You are the woman of my dreams…I love you.’ Then we made passionate love all night long. The mistress: 'Me too! The other night I met my lover at his office and I was wearing a raincoat, under it only the black bra, heels and mask over my eyes. When I opened the raincoat he didn’t say a word, but he started to tremble and we made wild love all night.' Then I had to share my story: 'When my husband came home I was wearing the black bra, black stockings, stilettos and a mask over my eyes. When he came in the door and saw me he said, “What’s for dinner, Zorro?”
Bob, an undertaker, recently came home with a black eye. He wife asked him, "What happened to you?" "I've had a terrible day!" says Bob. I had to go to a hotel, where a guest had died in his sleep! When I got there, the manager said they couldn't get him into a body bag, because he had a huge erection!" "Anyway, I went up, and sure enough there was this big naked man, lying on the bed with a huge erection! So I grabbed his erection with both hands and tried to bend it in half!" "I see!" said the wife, "That must have been terrible! But how did you get the black eye?" Bob replied, "Wrong room!"
