Disappointed by the Commonwealth Games coverage on TV. The guide says "55kg women's snatch", but it's just showing weightlifting!
When a group of tourists visited a crocodile farm, the owner of the place launched a daring proposal; -Whoever dares to jump, swim to shore and survive, I will give 1 million dollars. Nobody dared to move, suddenly a man jumped into the water and desperately swam towards the shore while he was chased by all the crocodiles. With great luck he arrived, taking the admiration of everyone in the place, then the owner announced; -We have a brave winner. After collecting their reward, the couple returned to the hotel, upon arrival, the manager told him; he was very brave to jump, then the man said; -I didn't jump, someone pushed me! His wife smiled ... Moral: "Behind every successful man, there is a woman who pushes him."
A woman asked an Army General when the last time he had made love to a woman. The general replied "1956, ma'am." The woman, in disbelief said "1956?! That long? Come with me and let me make your night better." The woman and general went back to her apartment and made passionate love for over an hour. Afterwards, the woman cuddled up to the general and said "Well, you sure haven't forgotten anything since 1956..." The general looked at her, confused, and replied "I sure hope not, it's only 2130 now."
