Thanks everyone for your concern. First off, I'm OK, I was a bit shaken up though. For those of you that aren’t aware, I was robbed at the petrol station earlier this morning. After my hands stopped trembling, I managed to call the Police. They were quick to respond and calmed me down because my blood pressure went through the roof! My money is gone however. The police asked me if I knew who did it and I told them, “Yes, it was pump number 2.”
This bloke in the pub said to me "F*ck me, that was a rough old bitch you were with last night . . . . not a patch on the women that I normally see you with. What on Earth ever possessed you to take her out ?" "I had to" I replied "it was our wedding anniversary."
Police officers have seized an uninsured ice-cream van after it was involved in a collision. The driver of the car that was hit sustained whippy lash.
I was watching the Bermuda Philharmonic Orchestra last night, and the bloke on the triangle disappeared.
The man who makes the giant eclairs at our local patisserie is retiring next week. There be some pretty big chouxs to fill when he goes......
I first met my girlfriend on a village green! There were marquees, food stalls, tug of war and a tombola Fete brought us together...
My mother in law is a big woman, she got run over last week. The driver said he had enough room to get round her. But he didn't have enough petrol....
