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JACK-ANORY FOR A FUNNY STORY - Joke Thread & Comedy Club

Discussion in 'Swansea City' started by swimaway, Jun 18, 2011.

  1. swantastic

    swantastic Well-Known Member

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  2. Matthew Bound Still Lurks

    Matthew Bound Still Lurks Well-Known Member

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  3. Matthew Bound Still Lurks

    Matthew Bound Still Lurks Well-Known Member

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    Breaking News:- The inventor of predictive text has died. His funfair will be hello on Sundial.
     
    #9583
  4. Matthew Bound Still Lurks

    Matthew Bound Still Lurks Well-Known Member

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    Patient: The problem is that obesity runs in our family. Doctor: No, the problem is no one runs in your family.
     
    #9584
  5. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

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  6. neveroffsidereff

    neveroffsidereff Well-Known Member

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  7. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

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  8. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    What's the difference between my wife and a terrorist?

    You can negotiate with a terrorist.
     
    #9588
  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    please log in to view this image
     
    #9589
  10. TheRealBubbles

    TheRealBubbles Well-Known Member

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    Brilliant
     
    #9590
    Wooperts_duck and Taffvalerowdy like this.

  11. swantastic

    swantastic Well-Known Member

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  12. duggie2000

    duggie2000 Well-Known Member

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  13. duggie2000

    duggie2000 Well-Known Member

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  14. neveroffsidereff

    neveroffsidereff Well-Known Member

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    An elderly man, who’s living alone in Salisbury wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was very difficult work, since the ground was hard.

    His only son, Paul, who used to help him, is now in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament:

    Dear Paul,

    I am feeling pretty sad, because it looks like I won’t be able to plant my tomato garden this year. I’m just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. I know if you were here my troubles would be over.. I know you would be happy to dig the plot for me, like in the old days.

    Love, Dad

    A few days later he received a letter from his son.

    Dear Dad,

    Don’t dig up that garden. That’s where the bodies are buried!

    Love,

    Paul.

    At 4 a.m. the next morning, Salisbury CID officers and local police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologised to the old man and left.

    That same day the old man received another letter from his son.

    Dear Dad,

    Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That’s the best I could do under the circumstances.

    Love Paul.

    Morale of the story - Always think outside the box to create the outcome you need.
     
    #9594
  15. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Are food prices in Michelin starred restaurants over inflated?
     
    #9595
  16. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    please log in to view this image
     
    #9596
  17. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

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  18. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

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  19. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

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  20. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

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