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JACK-ANORY FOR A FUNNY STORY - Joke Thread & Comedy Club

Discussion in 'Swansea City' started by swimaway, Jun 18, 2011.

  1. TheRealBubbles

    TheRealBubbles Well-Known Member

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  2. neveroffsidereff

    neveroffsidereff Well-Known Member

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    I’ve got that already. :)
     
    #5982
  3. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

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    Not Jezza’s <laugh>
     
    #5983
  4. neveroffsidereff

    neveroffsidereff Well-Known Member

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    That’s put me right off it now. :(
     
    #5984
  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Bargains like this don't come along every day!

    please log in to view this image
     
    #5985
  6. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #5986
  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #5987
  8. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #5988
    daimungeezer and Taffvalerowdy like this.
  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #5989
    daimungeezer and TheRealBubbles like this.
  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #5990

  11. swantastic

    swantastic Well-Known Member

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  12. swantastic

    swantastic Well-Known Member

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    A Golfing Nun…

    A nun walks into Mother Superior's office and plunks down into a
    chair.

    She lets out a sigh heavy with frustration.

    'What troubles you, Sister?' asked the Mother Superior.
    'I thought this was the day you spent with your family.'

    'It was,' sighed the Sister.

    'And I went to play golf with my brother.We try to play golf as often
    as we can. You know I was quite a talented golfer before I devoted
    my life to Christ.'

    'I seem to recall that,' the Mother Superior agreed.
    'So I take it your day of recreation was not relaxing?'

    'Far from it,' snorted the Sister.

    'In fact, I even took the Lord's name in vain today!'

    'Goodness, Sister!' gasped the Mother Superior, astonished.
    'you must tell me all about it!'

    'Well, we were on the fifth tee... and this hole is a monster, Mother.
    540 yard Par 5, with a nasty dogleg right and a hidden green...and I
    hit the drive of my life. I creamed it. The sweetest swing I ever made.

    And it's flying straight and true, right along the line I wanted...
    and it hits a bird in mid-flight!'

    'Oh my!' commiserated the Mother.

    'How unfortunate! But surely that didn't make you blaspheme,
    Sister!'

    'No, that wasn't it,' admitted Sister.

    'While I was still trying to fathom what had happened, this squirrel
    runs out of the woods, grabs my ball and runs off down the fairway!'

    'Oh, that would have made me blaspheme!' sympathized the Mother.

    'But I didn't, Mother!' sobbed the Sister.

    'And I was so proud of myself! And while I was pondering whether
    this was a sign from God, this hawk swoops out of the sky and grabs
    the squirrel and flies off, with my ball still clutched in his paws!'

    'So that's when you cursed,' said the Mother with a knowing smile.

    'Nope, that wasn't it either,' cried the Sister, anguished, 'because
    as the hawk started to fly out of sight, the squirrel started
    struggling, and the hawk dropped him right there on the green, and
    the ball popped out of his paws and rolled to about 18 inches from
    the cup!'

    Mother Superior sat back in her chair, folded her arms across her
    chest, fixed the Sister with a baleful stare and said...

    'You missed the fxxxxxg putt, didn't you?'
     
    #5992
  13. swantastic

    swantastic Well-Known Member

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  14. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #5994
    daimungeezer and Taffvalerowdy like this.
  15. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

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  16. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    #5996
  17. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

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  18. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    Charlie Sheen is American,
    Michael Sheen is British,
    but Mr Sheen is polish...
     
    #5998
  19. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #5999
  20. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #6000

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