Funny you should say that neveroffside !! When I was 11 we moved down to Portsmouth from the outskirts of London and lived in Southampton Road (near Port Solent), and I initially went to Paulsgrove Secondary Modern school. What an absolute sh*thole that place is
I was in the shopping centre this morning when a man approached me, collecting for Alzhiemer's. I said, "I've already given - don't you remember?"
I looked out of my window in horror tonight as a crowd gathered around a crashed motorcyclist... I rushed outside yelling, "Let me through, let me through"... A man at the front said, "Thank God for that, are you a Doctor"...? I said, "No, that's my Pizza"...
Little Susie was not the best student in Catholic School . Usually she slept through the class. One day her teacher, a Nun, called on her while she was sleeping. 'Tell me Susie, who created the universe?' When Susie didn't stir, little Johnny who was her friend sitting behind her, took his pencil and jabbed her in the rear. 'God Almighty!' shouted Susie. The Nun said, 'Very good' and continued teaching her class.. A little later the Nun asked Susie, 'Who is our Lord and Savior?' But Susie didn't stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to her rescue and stuck her in the butt. 'Jesus Christ!!!' shouted Susie. And the Nun once again said, 'Very good,' and Susie fell back asleep.. The Nun asked her a third question...'What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?' Again, Johnny came to the rescue. This time Susie jumped up and shouted, 'If you stick that damn thing in me one more time, I'll break it in half!' The nun fainted !
The other day a woman described me as a bit of a looker. Well, voyeur was the actual word she used......
How embarrassing. Just been to a BP Garage, getting a sandwich and crisps, and the woman at the checkout asked if I wanted to go for a drink......I told her I've got a wife.. she said it's part of the meal deal you p*ick !
