Apparently origami is due to debut at the 2020 Olympics. Unfortunately it will only be available to watch on paper view
VERY BRAVE MEN JOKES 1 -How do you turn a fox into an elephant? Marry it! 2 -What is the difference between a battery and a woman? A battery has a positive side. 3 - Why is the space between a woman's breasts and her hips called a waist? Because you could easily fit another pair of tits in there.. 4 - How do you make 5 pounds of fat look good? Put a nipple on it. 5 - Why do women fake orgasms ? Because they think men care. 6 - If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag at you, what have you done wrong? Made her chain too long 7 - Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman? Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you. 8 - Why do women have smaller feet than men? It's one of those 'evolutionary things' that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink. 9 - Why do men pass gas more than women? Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure. 10 - If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first ? The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in. 11 - Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%... It's called a Wedding Cake. 12 - Why do men die before their wives? Because they want to.
Two Irishman are making letter bombs. Paddy says "Mick do you think I have put enough explosive in this envelope" Mick says " Don"t know, open it and see" "But it"ll explode" says Paddy "Don"t Be Stupid" Mick says "It"s not addressed to you!!"
A general store owner hires a young female assistant with a penchant for very short skirts. One day a young man enters the store, glances at the assistant, and glances at the loaves of bread behind the counter. "I'd like some raisin bread, please," the man says politely. The assistant nods and climbs up a ladder to reach the raisin bread, located on the very top shelf. The man, standing almost directly beneath her, is provided with an excellent view. As the assistant retrieves the bread, a small group of male customers gather around the young man, looking in the same direction. Pretty soon each person is asking for raisin bread, just to see the assistant climb up and down. After a few trips the assistant is tired and irritated. She stops and fumes at the top of the ladder, glaring at the men standing below. She notices an elderly man standing amongst the crowd. "Is yours raisin too?" the assistant yells testily. "No," croaks the feeble old man.... "But it's startin' to twitch!
How come when Supermodels walk down the aisle in their underwear it's called "Art" and "Fashion". Yet when I do it,I'm "Drunk" and "Not allowed back into Tesco"
I was at the moneychanger at the Heathrow airport today. There was just one lady in front of me, an Asian - Japanese lady who was trying to exchange yen to pounds. It was obvious she was a little irritated. She asked the teller, "Why it change?Yesterday, I get two hunat pound fo my yen. Today I only get hunat eighty? Why it change?" The teller shrugged his shoulders and said, "Fluctuations." The Japanese lady says, "Fluc you white people too"..
