Hot Weather Problems (on a Friday)

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Oldsparkey

Oldsparkey

Well-Known Member
Forum Moderator
Jan 27, 2011
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Porthcawl Riviera
I need to get my lawns back into shape, so should I attempt to cut them, or set them alight?

Is it dangerous to stand starkers in front of the fridge with the door open?

Anyone got any other problems?
 
First point - a can of petrol and a match should do the trick but make sure your missus has taken the washing in first.

Second point - depends what state of excitement you are in and how close you are to the closing fridge door.
 
BluefromBridgend said:
First point - a can of petrol and a match should do the trick but make sure your missus has taken the washing in first.

Second point - depends what state of excitement you are in and how close you are to the closing fridge door.
Click to expand...

The first answer is OK, but I'm waiting for the wife to go on before I light it.

The second one depends on how many sausages are in there when the the wife's sister comes in with a fork.
 
1. Notice you stood there in all your glory.
2. Her forking the extra uncooked sausage in the fridge.

The latter brings tears to my eyes.
 
Come to think of it, the wife's sister is a bit short-sighted. I'd be more worried if she came for the cucumber.

The wife has just come back from the hairdresser and gone down onto the lawn. Now where did I put those matches?
 
Just had 4 whole minutes of,,,, um,,, yes I think it was rain. When I say rain I mean some wet stuff fell from the sky but you had to run around a bit to get hit by it....
 
Taff

Well done you.

None in Newport yet but a long way from Wiesbaden.

Sparks

Why, is it green?

You gave them to her sister to hold while your hands were otherwise engaged.
 
BluefromBridgend said:
Taff

Well done you.

None in Newport yet but a long way from Wiesbaden.

Sparks

Why, is it green?

You gave them to her sister to hold while your hands were otherwise engaged.
Click to expand...

No, but she's colour blind as well.

I was going to say a marrow, but that would be pushing it (only slightly though).
 
1st don't worry sparks I`ll come down and smoke the lot for you...if you don't mind my festival tent in your garden for a few days that is.

2nd....I`d say defo....a bit of cold does nowt for a mans manhood .......get it out in the sun and watch it grow instead sparks.....your misses will be well happy with ya
 
Oldsparkey said:
I need to get my lawns back into shape, so should I attempt to cut them, or set them alight?

Is it dangerous to stand starkers in front of the fridge with the door open?

Anyone got any other problems?
Click to expand...


Sparks, the best time to cut the grass would be after 8pm. If its that high that it looks like a scene from Gorillas in the must then don't kill yourself and do it over two nights if its that bad. When you've got it nice and short then water it but again later at night, not when the sun is out or you could well scorch the grass. Keep an eye on the weather forecast and when it's due to rain put done lawn feed down the day before. It'll come out a treat and be back to being lush and green again.

Whatever you do don't let Aber smoke the grass cos if the winds blowing in the right direction they'll have to close the Severn bridge :D
 
"they'll have to close the Severn bridge" dilli tbh that wouldn't be a bad thing <laugh>........
 
cartoon you be ok I know a trap door escape route for ew. <ok>.....enjoy your day out dude,dont worry about the result coz its only a friendly init.<wink>


neveroff good man, keep up thy good work <laugh>
 
2moro that is musty>>>>>them abo`s got fk all on me when im hungry......my lad better watch he doesn't fatten up over night or he`ll be missing a leg by the lunch time
 
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