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Off Topic Heres a joke for you all

Discussion in 'Queens Park Rangers' started by kiwiqpr, Feb 23, 2012.

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  1. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

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    #15841
    Taffvalerowdy, Nov 19, 2023
    UTRs, Didley Squat, Hammersmith bookie and 2 others like this.
  2. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

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    #15842
    Taffvalerowdy, Nov 19, 2023
    Didley Squat, Hammersmith bookie and kiwiqpr like this.
  3. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

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    #15843
    Taffvalerowdy, Nov 19, 2023
    Didley Squat, Hammersmith bookie, Wooperts_duck and 1 other person like this.
  4. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

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    #15844
    Taffvalerowdy, Nov 19, 2023
    Didley Squat, Hammersmith bookie, Wooperts_duck and 1 other person like this.
  5. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

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    #15845
    Taffvalerowdy, Nov 19, 2023
    Hammersmith bookie likes this.
  6. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

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    #15846
    Taffvalerowdy, Nov 19, 2023
    Flanman, Hammersmith bookie, Wooperts_duck and 2 others like this.
  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15847
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 19, 2023
    kiwiqpr, Hammersmith bookie and Taffvalerowdy like this.
  8. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15848
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 19, 2023
    kiwiqpr, Hammersmith bookie and Taffvalerowdy like this.
  9. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

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    #15849
    Taffvalerowdy, Nov 19, 2023
    kiwiqpr, Uber_Hoop, Hammersmith bookie and 1 other person like this.
  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    I was telling a girl in the pub about my ability to guess what day a woman was born just by feeling her boobs. "Really" she said, "Go on then...try." After about thirty seconds of fondling her breasts she began to lose patience and said. "Come on, what day was I born"?

    I replied, “Yesterday."
     
    #15850
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 19, 2023
    UTRs, Taffvalerowdy, kiwiqpr and 1 other person like this.

  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15851
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 20, 2023
    Taffvalerowdy, Hammersmith bookie, Didley Squat and 2 others like this.
  12. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    A taxi was driving through a lower class town area, in the back of the taxi was a lady and her 12 year old son, he said "Mum, why are all these ladies standing in shop doorways?
    She said," oh, they're just waiting on there husband's coming home from work".
    The taxi driver says "why don't you tell him the truth, they're on the game, they sell sex for money"!
    The boy said "Is that true mum?, she says" I'm afraid so ".
    The boy says," if one of these ladies has a baby, what happens to it?,
    Mum says "It becomes a taxi driver……
     
    #15852
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 20, 2023
    Taffvalerowdy, Hammersmith bookie, daverangers and 1 other person like this.
  13. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15853
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 20, 2023
    Taffvalerowdy, Hammersmith bookie, MickMack and 2 others like this.
  14. Didley Squat

    Didley Squat Well-Known Member

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    .
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    #15854
    Didley Squat, Nov 22, 2023
    Wooperts_duck, Taffvalerowdy, kiwiqpr and 1 other person like this.
  15. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

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    #15855
    Taffvalerowdy, Nov 22, 2023
    daverangers, Uber_Hoop, kiwiqpr and 2 others like this.
  16. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

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    Dwayne Peel flies to Baghdad to watch a young Iraqi boy play Rugby.

    He is suitably impressed and arranges for him to come over and sign for the Scarlets, with an eye on Welsh Selection in time for the Rugby World Cup.

    Two weeks later, the Scarlets are 16-0 down to Cardiff Blues with only 20 minutes left, the young Iraqi gets the nod and on he goes.

    The lad is a sensation, scores 2 tries, sets up another 2 and kicks 4 goals in 20 minutes and wins the game for the Scarlets.

    The fans are delighted, the players and coaches are delighted and the rugby media love the new star.

    When the lad comes off the pitch he phones his mum to tell her about his first day in Welsh Rugby.

    'Hello mum, guess what?' he says 'I played for 20 minutes today, we were 16-0 down but I scored 2 tries, set up 2 tries and kicked 4 goals and we won. Everybody loves me, the fans, the media, they all love me.'

    'Wonderful,' says his mum, 'Let me tell you about my day. Your father got shot in the street and robbed, your sister and I were ambushed, beaten up then assaulted, now your brother has joined a gang of drug dealers, and all while you were having such great time.'

    The young lad is very upset. 'What can I say mum, but I'm really sorry..'

    'Sorry?!!! Sorry?!!!' screams his mum, 'it's your ****ing fault we came to Llanelli in the first place’.
     
    #15856
    Taffvalerowdy, Nov 22, 2023
    kiwiqpr, Wooperts_duck, Ranger4ever and 1 other person like this.
  17. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

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    #15857
    Taffvalerowdy, Nov 22, 2023
    Uber_Hoop, daverangers, Flanman and 3 others like this.
  18. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

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    #15858
    Taffvalerowdy, Nov 22, 2023
    kiwiqpr and Wooperts_duck like this.
  19. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15859
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 22, 2023
    Uber_Hoop and kiwiqpr like this.
  20. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    My First Attempt At Beef Wellington......

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    #15860
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 22, 2023
    Uber_Hoop and kiwiqpr like this.
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