The Black Bra I had lunch with 2 of my unmarried friends. One is engaged, one is a mistress and I, the third one, have been married for 20 years. We were chatting about our relationships and decided to amaze our men by greeting them at the door wearing a black bra, stiletto heels and a mask over our eyes. We agreed to meet in a few days to exchange notes. Here’s how it all went. My engaged friend: The other night when my boyfriend came over he found me with a black leather bodice, tall stilettos, and a mask. He saw me and said, ‘You are the woman of my dreams…I love you.’ Then we made passionate love all night long. The mistress: 'Me too! The other night I met my lover at his office and I was wearing a raincoat, under it only the black bra, heels and mask over my eyes. When I opened the raincoat he didn’t say a word, but he started to tremble and we made wild love all night.' Then I had to share my story: 'When my husband came home I was wearing the black bra, black stockings, stilettos and a mask over my eyes. When he came in the door and saw me he said, “What’s for dinner, Zorro?”
Bob, an undertaker, recently came home with a black eye. He wife asked him, "What happened to you?" "I've had a terrible day!" says Bob. I had to go to a hotel, where a guest had died in his sleep! When I got there, the manager said they couldn't get him into a body bag, because he had a huge erection!" "Anyway, I went up, and sure enough there was this big naked man, lying on the bed with a huge erection! So I grabbed his erection with both hands and tried to bend it in half!" "I see!" said the wife, "That must have been terrible! But how did you get the black eye?" Bob replied, "Wrong room!"
Burial At Sea Betty and Barbie, two blonde sisters had promised their uncle they would bury him at sea when he died. Their uncle had been a seafaring gentleman all his life and it was to be his final wish. Of course, in due time, he did pass away and the two blondes kept their promise. They cast off from Fort Lauderdale with their uncle all stitched up in a burial bag and loaded onto his rowboat. After rowing for quite some time, Betty says, 'Do you think we're out far enough?' Barbie slips over the side and almost immediately says, 'No, this will never do -- the water is only up to my chest.' So they row on some more, and Barbie slips over the side once again and disappears. Quite a bit of time goes by while Barbie is under water and poor Betty is really getting worried. Suddenly, Barbie breaks the surface, gasping for breath. 'Well is it deep enough yet, Sis?' Betty inquires. 'Yes,finally! Hand me the shovel.'
