A good mate of mine was cremated last week. He happened to love a drink or ten. Took 5 days to put him out!
China Had Invented A Machine That Catches Thieves; They Took It Out To Different Countries For A Test!! U.S, in 30 minutes it Caught 20 Thieves Spain, in 20 minutes it caught 25 Thieves! Swaziland, in 10 minutes it caught 6,000 Thieves Zimbabwe, in 2 minutes it caught 200,000 Thieves Liverpool, in 5 minutes the Machine was GONE!
I went in to my chemists and asked for some Viagra, "Do you have a prescription " asked the pharmacist, "No" I said " but I have a photograph of the wife "