Off Topic Heres a joke for you all

Discussion in 'Queens Park Rangers' started by kiwiqpr, Feb 23, 2012.

  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #10961
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  2. Wooperts_duck

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    #10962
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  3. Wooperts_duck

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    #10963
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  4. Wooperts_duck

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    #10964
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  5. Wooperts_duck

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    #10965
  6. Wooperts_duck

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    #10966
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  7. Wooperts_duck

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    #10967
  8. Wooperts_duck

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    #10968
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  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Sylvester Stallone, Bruce Willis and Arnold Schwarzenegger were discussing who they were going to play in the new Hollywood Blockbuster: The Great Composers!
    "I wanna be Beethoven," said Stallone.
    "I gotta be Mozart," replied Willis
    "What about you, Arnie?" they asked............"I'll be Bach !"
     
    #10969
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  10. Wooperts_duck

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    #10970
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  11. Wooperts_duck

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    #10971
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  12. Wooperts_duck

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    #10972
  13. Wooperts_duck

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    #10973
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  14. Wooperts_duck

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    An Irishman goes to the doctor, who after examining him says
    “You have some problems with your heart, but if you take these tablets, I think it will be okay.
    “So the doctor gives the man the tablets and the patient asks,
    “Do I have to take them every day?”
    No,” replies the doctor, “take one on the Monday, skip the Tuesday, take one on the Wednesday, skip the Thursday and go on like that.
    “Two weeks later the doctor is walking down the street, and he sees the patient’s wife.“Hello Mrs Murphy,” he says, “how’s your husband?”
    “Oh he died of a heart attack,” says Mrs Murphy.
    “I’m very sorry to hear that,” says the doctor, “I thought if he took those tablets he would be all right.”
    “Oh the tablets were fine,” says Mrs Murphy,
    “It was all the bloody skipping that killed him!”
     
    #10974
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  15. Wooperts_duck

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    #10975
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  16. Wooperts_duck

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    My gay dyslexic mate hasn't come out of the closet yet.

    He's in Daniel........
     
    #10976
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  17. Wooperts_duck

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    #10977
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  18. Wooperts_duck

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    I went to fish restaurant recently and ordered the Octopus.
    The waiter said: "It takes 4 hours to cook."
    I said: "Why?"
    He said: "Because it keeps turning the gas off."
     
    #10978
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  19. Wooperts_duck

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    Bad day today, I failed my driving test on the Highway Code.
    The Instructor said to me, “If you are going down a country road what signs are you likely to see?"
    I said, “Eggs for sale, pick your own strawberries and free manure”.
     
    #10979
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  20. Wooperts_duck

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    #10980
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