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Off Topic Heres a joke for you all

Discussion in 'Queens Park Rangers' started by kiwiqpr, Feb 23, 2012.

  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    A man asked a waiter to take a bottle of Merlot to an unusually attractive woman sitting alone at a table in a cozy little restaurant.

    So the waiter took the Merlot to the woman and said, 'This is from the gentleman who is seated over there.' .and indicated the sender
    with a nod of his head. She stared at the wine coolly for a few seconds, not looking at the man, then decided to send a reply to him by a note.

    The waiter, who was lingering nearby for a response, took the note from her and conveyed it to the gentleman.

    The note read: 'For me to accept this bottle, you need to have a Mercedes in your garage, a million dollars in the bank and 7 inches in your pants '

    After reading the note, the man decided to compose one of his own in return. He folded the note, handed it to the waiter and instructed him to deliver it to the lady.

    It read: 'Just to let you know things aren't always what they appear to be, I have a Ferrari Maranello, BMW Z8, Mercedes CL600, and a Porsche Turbo in my several garages; I have a beautiful homes in Aspen , Miami , and a 10,000 acre ranch in Louisiana . There is over twenty million dollars in my bank account and portfolio. But, not even for a woman as beautiful as you are, would I cut off three inches. Just send the bottle back.
     
    #8361
  2. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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  3. Uber_Hoop

    Uber_Hoop Well-Known Member

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    I had a prostate exam yesterday and I thought it was essential practice that all jewellery had to be removed during the procedure.

    However my doctor still managed to lose his tongue stud..
     
    #8363
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  4. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8364
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  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8365
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  6. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8366
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  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8367
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  8. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8368
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  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8369
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  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8370

  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8371
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  12. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8372
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  13. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    I'm not saying people around my way have bad teeth but I was just at the tills in Asda and the woman next to me smiled and the barcode scanner picked it up as set of casserole dishes..
     
    #8373
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  14. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    #8374
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  15. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.
     
    #8375
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  16. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah; I thought, ”He’s trying to pull a fast one”.
     
    #8376
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  17. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Four fonts walk into a bar the barman says

    ”Oi – get out! We don’t want your type in here”
     
    #8377
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  18. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8378
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  19. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8379
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  20. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8380
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