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Off Topic Heres a joke for you all

Discussion in 'Queens Park Rangers' started by kiwiqpr, Feb 23, 2012.

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  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    I entered the young musician of the year today

    She didn't half scream..........
     
    #7821
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 26, 2019
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  2. Uber_Hoop

    Uber_Hoop Well-Known Member

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    155A3233-FE54-4741-A58E-B20EA467F07D.jpeg
     
    #7822
    Uber_Hoop, Nov 27, 2019
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  3. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #7823
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 27, 2019
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  4. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #7824
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 27, 2019
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  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #7825
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 27, 2019
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  6. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    A young man wanted to buy a Christmas present for his new girlfriend. They hadn't been seeing each other for very long and she lived some distance away. He consulted with his sister and decided, after careful consideration, that a pair of good quality gloves would strike the right note... not too romantic and not too personal. Off he went with his sister to Marks and Spencer’s and they selected a dainty pair of fur lined quality leather gloves. His sister bought a pair of sexy knickers for herself at the same time. Marks and Spencer’s had a free gift wrap offer but the assistant mixed up the two items, the sister got the gloves and our man unknowingly got the knickers. So he sent off his gift wrapped present in a parcel with the following letter.
    Dear Maggie
    I chose these because I've noticed that you are not wearing any when we go out in the evenings. If it had not been for my sister I would have chosen the long ones with buttons, but she wears shorter ones (which are easier to remove). These are a very delicate shade, but the lady I bought them from showed me the pair she had been wearing for the past three weeks and I hardly noticed any marks. I had her try yours on for me and she looked really smart in them even though they were a little bit tight on her. She also said that they rub against her ring which helps keep it clean. In fact she hasn't needed to wash it since she began wearing them.
    I wish I was there to put them on for you the first time, as no doubt many other hands will touch them before I have a chance to see you again.
    When you take them off remember to blow into them a little bit because they will be naturally a little damp from wearing.
    Just imagine how many times my lips will kiss them during the coming year.
    I hope you will wear them for me on our next date.
    All my love,
    P.

    P.S. My mum tells me that the latest style is to wear them folded down with a little bit of fur showing.
     
    #7826
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 27, 2019
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  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #7827
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 28, 2019
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  8. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #7828
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 28, 2019
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  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #7829
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 28, 2019
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  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #7830
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 28, 2019
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  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #7831
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 28, 2019
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  12. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #7832
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 28, 2019
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  13. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #7833
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 28, 2019
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  14. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #7834
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 28, 2019
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  15. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Ant & Dec have announced that Yoko Ono will be joining the rest of the Celebrities in the jungle on Friday.

    She is also tipped to win, as she has been living off a dead Beatle for the past 30 odd years!
     
    #7835
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 28, 2019
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  16. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #7836
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 28, 2019
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  17. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #7837
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 28, 2019
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  18. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #7838
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 28, 2019
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  19. IwasanotherwatfordR

    IwasanotherwatfordR Well-Known Member

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    My mate from Liverpool has started working in the local slaughterhouse, stunning the animals.

    They’ve never seen a scouser with a job before.
     
    #7839
    IwasanotherwatfordR, Nov 28, 2019
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  20. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #7840
    Wooperts_duck, Nov 29, 2019
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