Mike Ashley has bought HMV. Well, he did promise Newcastle United he would make a record signing this transfer window........
A Charity Pantomine in aid of paranoid schizophrenics and homosexuals descended into chaos yesterday when someone shouted, "he"s behind you."
When I was growing up, we were so poor my mum bought my clothes from an army and navy shop. I went to school dressed as a Japanese admiral.
A Brummie walks into a tailors and says: “Alroit, mate. I’d like a 70s suit, please.” The tailor says: “Certainly sir, and would you like a kipper tie?” Brummie says: “Thanks mate, two sugars"
