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Off Topic Heres a joke for you all

Discussion in 'Queens Park Rangers' started by kiwiqpr, Feb 23, 2012.

  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #4641
  2. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    #4642
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  3. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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  4. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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  5. Stroller

    Stroller Well-Known Member

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    A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She reduced altitude and spotted a man below. She descended a bit more and shouted: "'Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago but I don't know where I am". The man below replied "You're in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You're between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude".

    "You must be a technician." said the balloonist. "I am" replied the man "how did you know?" "Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you have told me is probably technically correct, but I've no idea what to make of your information and the fact is, I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help at all. If anything, you've delayed my trip with your talk."

    The man below responded, "You must be in management". "I am" replied the balloonist, "but how did you know?" "Well," said the man "you don't know where you are or where you're going. You have risen to where you are, due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise, which you've no idea how to keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problems. The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, it's my ****ing fault!
     
    #4645
  6. jimileysbaldhead

    jimileysbaldhead Well-Known Member

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    My grandad was killed by a steam train, apparently he was chuffed to bits.
     
    #4646
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  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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  8. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    IN RESPONSE TO ALL RECENT E-MAILS ABOUT OUR DOG:

    PLEASE BE ADVISED, WE ARE SICK AND TIRED OF ANSWERING QUESTIONS ABOUT HIM.

    YES, HE BIT TWO PEOPLE WEARING BURKAS,

    TEN PEOPLE WEARING TURBANS,

    TWENTY PEOPLE WEARING JEREMY CORBYN T-SHIRTS,

    TWO CAR DRIVERS WITH RAP MUSIC BLARING FROM THEIR VEHICLES,

    FOUR JEHOVAH'S WITNESSES,

    TWO MORMONS,

    NINE TEENAGERS WITH PANTS HANGING PAST THEIR ASS CRACKS,

    THREE MUSLIMS AND A PAKISTANI TAXI DRIVER.



    BUT, FOR THE LAST TIME. . .



    THIS DOG IS NOT FOR SALE !!
     
    #4648
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  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #4649
  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #4650

  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #4651
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  12. Uber_Hoop

    Uber_Hoop Well-Known Member

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    I’m sure I’m being thick, but me no understand.
     
    #4652
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  13. sb_73

    sb_73 Well-Known Member

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    Look in the red car Uber.
     
    #4653
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  14. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #4654
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  15. Uber_Hoop

    Uber_Hoop Well-Known Member

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    Is it supposed to a naked guy or seats? Is that it?
     
    #4655
    Last edited: Aug 11, 2018
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  16. Uber_Hoop

    Uber_Hoop Well-Known Member

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  17. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #4657
  18. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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  19. Uber_Hoop

    Uber_Hoop Well-Known Member

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    Lollipop or Calippo?
     
    #4659
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  20. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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