The day after my old man's funeral. I nailed my mates Mam. I was 19 and she was 40. 29th March, 2003. What a night that was 
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Id be fukcin horrifiedI didn't do it out of spite mate, she was a ****ing milf, I was only 20/21... I didn't give him a second's thought.
There was a bird in the forces, she was a right goer. She ended up marrying a lad we were all good mates with, but he never knew that me and one of my pals used to steam through her every few days. She used to grade us and we'd compete to beat each other the next time... imagine if somebody told you that about your wife
obviously you can remember the date because of your dads funeral and not coz of the shag?The day after my old man's funeral. I nailed my mates Mam. I was 19 and she was 40. 29th March, 2003. What a night that was
The day after my old man's funeral. I nailed my mates Mam. I was 19 and she was 40. 29th March, 2003. What a night that was
I had my leave cancelled that week as Op Telic had just kicked off, I was ****ing raging as me and the lads had booked a trip to Amsterdam.
I've said it before, if there was a thread just for reminiscing about past shag shenanigans, I'd rattle on for months about it. Some of them are for my private collection in my mind, but it's funny reading other people's stories on here, shags that were buried deep in the grey matter of my brain have resurfaced.
One woman's hubby used to work away, told my mates that when we were out at the pub she came onto me, because i knew the fella i knocked her back.
My mates starting pissing themselves at me coz they had been boning her for ages, needless to say the next time i was straight in there.
Wasn't impressed with my so called fukcin mates though, pair of twats should have told me before.
My mates starting pissing themselves at me coz they had been boning her for ages, needless to say the next time i was straight in there.
Wasn't impressed with my so called fukcin mates though, pair of twats should have told me before.
We used to go to a rave at a bar called Oasis in Bishop Auckland. At the time me and my mate had been doubling up on this munter who was a complete nut job. Anyway, one night after the rave we filled the mini bus with lads and took them back to Jarra where every single person went through her. I think it was either 8 or 9 lads. They were ****ing cocks everywhere. She had this water feature thing in the bedroom and while my mate was waiting for a hole to become available, he pissed in it and a big piss cloud come over everybody and covered the entire room
Ever gone twos up on the bar maid from your local with one of your mates only for your mate to go all Mr floppy on her? I have. Bucked her right in front of him while he sat in his own self loathing shame. She was on shift when we went in a couple of days later. Awkward.
We used to go to a rave at a bar called Oasis in Bishop Auckland. At the time me and my mate had been doubling up on this munter who was a complete nut job. Anyway, one night after the rave we filled the mini bus with lads and took them back to Jarra where every single person went through her. I think it was either 8 or 9 lads. They were ****ing cocks everywhere. She had this water feature thing in the bedroom and while my mate was waiting for a hole to become available, he pissed in it and a big piss cloud come over everybody and covered the entire room
I once had my emails audited at work when I was in the forces, and my boss was given the transcript of them all. There was a few back and forth about her, between me and my mate, saying what we'd do if she was up for it. She ended up sitting me down in a small briefing room, she was a Sergeant at the time so couldn't be seen to be getting mugged off, she shouted for about 5 mins saying I was supposed to be doing work etc, blah blah, I wasn't really listening I was probably staring at her tits.
Anyway, I couldn't take her seriously so I started to smirk and she stopped shouting, then as I stood up, to leave she said "What if I was up for it?"... No word of a lie, fastest boner in human history.
Anyway, I couldn't take her seriously so I started to smirk and she stopped shouting, then as I stood up, to leave she said "What if I was up for it?"... No word of a lie, fastest boner in human history.
my missus remembers all sorts of stupid dates, she asked me one time...do you know what day this is?Yeah, I'm not a woman mate
Fukc me i was racking my brains, anniversary, birthday totally stumped i had to give up and expecting the worst.
She said it was the day when i first took her to the pictures... i mean what the fukc that was like twenty odd years ago.
How can anyone remember stupid little bits of useless info like that, like you said 83, its a women thing.
never had twos up. to old for it now and don't think the wife would be up for it either lolEver gone twos up on the bar maid from your local with one of your mates only for your mate to go all Mr floppy on her? I have. Bucked her right in front of him while he sat in his own self loathing shame. She was on shift when we went in a couple of days later. Awkward.
Ever gone twos up on the bar maid from your local with one of your mates only for your mate to go all Mr floppy on her? I have. Bucked her right in front of him while he sat in his own self loathing shame. She was on shift when we went in a couple of days later. Awkward.
I've been involved in something similar, with a bar maid mate, but not as tragic as that story.
I've done mmf and mff. I know which I'd recommend and which I wouldn't.
It was bad mate, I was doing her from behind while she was noshing him off, little did I know she was struggling to get him going. I was the final hours of a 4 day bender, we'd been putting mdma in our joints and all kinds, proper full on binging with complete disregard for our own safety. He just couldn't get it going. Didn't work any more. He's partial to a bit of wizz, that stinking cat piss paste stuff(don't touch it, it spaces me out strangely) so you can see where he went wrong.
Ever gone twos up on the bar maid from your local with one of your mates only for your mate to go all Mr floppy on her? I have. Bucked her right in front of him while he sat in his own self loathing shame. She was on shift when we went in a couple of days later. Awkward.
My ex had her mate round one night and I had my mate over. I went to bed early because I just couldn't be bothered, they stayed downstairs drinking. My mate had ****ed off, and I had fell asleep, I was woke up by getting elbowed when I opened my eye, my lass was on top of her pal necking on and her mate had her tits out. It was game on then, had a wicked night. It was in Hebburn, strangely enough.
MFF is class, you should go behind your wifes back and pay for it one night, if that's what it takes.
MMF is nigh on impossible to get serious. You just do it for **** and giggles, high 5's and all that jazz.
Me and my pal used to do MMFF bare times back in the day, it was like ****ing musical chairs, with student nurses. They're every bit as slutty as you'd imagine, but the uniforms are ****... Put ya nurses outfit on love.... nah, fam, take that **** off, you look like you're gonna clean my toilet.
I was shagging a student nurse, mate. An Indian girl, she was lovely and up there with the best sex in my life. Probably the only girl I've ever really loved as well. Filthy didn't even begin to cover it.
Only done MMFF together once, usually it was just bed swapping with my pals with the tarts we brought back, done that a fair few times like.
They'd make us breakfast and everything, proper hosts student nurses. It was like a really good hotel where you get to shag the staff.