Fraizer Campbell

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If I was a footballer, I'd never celebrate any goal and would in fact deliberately look as disappointed as possible.

I'd make sure I looked angry with myself that I didn't score with more finesse, more panache.

Really ramp up the arrogance.

As it is, I'm ****.

Ah well.
 
Celebrations are too long these days anyway.

Change the rules so the conceding team can kick-off within 30 seconds of a goal and that'll soon stop the ****ers.