Forum and Computers HELP! thread and Siddals bar

Sorry you haven't had a reply sooner mate.

Top of page click "settings".

Then all down the left of the page you will see your settings, have a play around in there, you can't break owt and if you feel something needs changing later, go back in and do it again.

 

Thanks for your help mate....still getting used to not606...will get there in the end!

 

No problem mate, like I've said before no stupid questions, only stupid answers.

 

Banner headline is good but why are letters missing, can it not be put right?

 

Hello everyone!! I think this site is great.

 

For you, I'm sure I could find a HobNob Debbie.

 

how do i get my attatchments to be a bigger size rather than the thumbnails, you probably noticed i like to add attatchments sometimes, but theyr'e kinda lost being so small, cheers mate

 

F5

 

If the pictures or whatever are on the Web just link to them by going advanced whilst posting.
Otherwise sign up to the likes of Imageshack upload your picture to there and paste the link into your post.
Preview them to make sure they are showing up and...

Like so....

please log in to view this image

 

Also for one off images you could use Tinypic.com then just use the forum share option for the link.

ala...

please log in to view this image

 

Newbie here

didn't post on the old 606 but just came across this forum so decided to register.

Handy finding another forum that seems to have a active Sunderland section

 

hi all. used to post sporadically on 606 under same name but just joined not606. looking forward to reading up on everyone's thought's on safc again

 

Completely off topic. How do you get/give rep?


EDIT found that but still


Can I see who gave it to me?

 

Only if the poster puts their name.

 

A plane leaves Toronto airport under the control of a Jewish captain.

His co-pilot is Chinese. It's the first time they've flown together, and an awkward silence between the two seems to indicate a mutual dislike.

Once they reach cruising altitude, the Jewish captain activates the auto-pilot, leans back in his seat, and mutters,

'I don't like Chinese.'

'No rike Chinese?' asks the co-pilot,'… ..why not?'

'You people bombed Pearl Harbour , that's why!'

'No, no,' the co-pilot protests, 'Chinese not bomb Purrh Hahbah! Dat Japanese, not
Chinese.'

'Japanese, Chinese, Vietnamese.. ..doesn't matter, you're all alike!'

There's a few minutes of silence.

'I no rike Jews either!' the co-pilot suddenly announces.

'Oh yeah, why not?' asks the captain.

'Jews sink Titanic' says the co-pilot.

'What? That's insane! Jews didn't sink the Titanic! 'exclaims the captain, 'It was an iceberg!'

'Iceberg, Goldberg, Greenberg, Rosenberg , …no maddah…ahll same.

 

It's 2012 and it's the Olympics in London .

A Scotsman, an Englishman and an Irishman want to get in, but they haven't got tickets.

The Scotsman picks up a manhole cover, tucks it under his arm and walks to the gate. "McTavish, Scotland," he says, "Discus" and in he walks.

The Englishman picks up a length of scaffolding and slings it over his shoulder. "Waddington-Smythe, England " he says, "Pole vault" and in he walks.

The Irishman looks around and picks up a roll of barbed wire and tucks it under his arm. "O'Malley, Ireland " he says, "Fencing."

 

A farmer named Seamus had a car accident.
In court, the lorry company's fancy hot shot solicitor was questioning Seamus.

"Didn't you say, to the Garda at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine,'?" asked the solicitor.

Seamus responded, "Well, I'll tell you what happened. I had just
loaded my favourite cow, Bessie, into the…"

"I didn't ask for any details", the solicitor interrupted. "Just
answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine!'?"

Seamus said, "Well, I had just got Bessie into the trailer and I was
driving down the road…."

The solicitor interrupted again and said, "Your Honour, I am trying to
establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told
the Gárda on the scene that he was fine. Now several weeks after the
accident he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud.
Please tell him to simply answer the question."

By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Seamus's answer and
said to the solicitor, "I'd like to hear what he has to say about his
favourite cow, Bessie".

Seamus thanked the Judge and proceeded. "Well as I was saying, I had
just loaded Bessie, my favourite cow, into the trailer and was driving her
down the road when this huge lorry and trailer came through a stop sign
and hit my trailer right in the side. I was Thrown into one ditch and Bessie
was thrown into the other. I was hurt, very bad like, and didn't want to move.
However, I could hear old Bessie moaning and groaning. I knew she was
in terrible shape just by her groans.

Shortly after the accident a
garda on a motorbike turned up. He could hear Bessie moaning and
groaning so he went over to her. After he looked at her, and saw her
condition, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes.

Then the Garda came across the road, gun still in hand, looked at me,
and said, "How are you feeling?"……………

"Now what the Feck would you say?"

 

the old ones are the best . . .


A man boarded an aircraft at London’s Heathrow Airport for New York, and taking his seat as he settled in, he noticed a very beautiful woman boarding the plane.
He realised she was heading straight toward his seat and bingo – she took the seat right beside him.

‘Hello’, he blurted out, ‘Business trip or vacation?’

She turned, smiled enchantingly and said, ‘Business. I'm going to the annual nymphomaniac convention in the United States.’

He swallowed hard. Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting for nymphomaniacs!

Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, ‘What's your business role at this convention?’

‘Lecturer,’ she responded,’ I use my experience to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality.’

‘Really’, he smiled, ‘what myths are those?’

‘Well,’ she explained, ‘one popular myth is that African-American men are the most well endowed when, in fact, it's the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait. Another popular myth is that French men are the best lovers, when actually it is the men of Greek descent. We have also found that the best potential lovers in all categories are the Irish.’

Suddenly the woman became uncomfortable and blushed. ‘I'm sorry,’ she said. ‘I really shouldn't be discussing this with you; I don't even know your name!’



‘Tonto,’ the man said. ‘Tonto Papadopoulos, but my friends call me Paddy.’

 

The wife and I were sitting around the breakfast table one lazy Sunday morning.
I said to her, "If I were to die suddenly, I want you to immediately sell all my stuff."
"Now why would you want me to do something like that?" she asked.
"I figure that you would eventually remarry and I don't want some other ****er using my stuff."

She looked at me and said: "What makes you think I'd marry another ****er?"

 

Would you put your life savings on one spin of the roulette wheel?