Off Topic Dopey Dick

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Jan 24, 2011
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“Call me Eish-mail”


Tis on my way to to Blackpool to sign up on a whaler ‘The Pea Brain’ Captain HIAB (Is A Bottler) is an ungodly man full of self interest and vanities. Spud Disciple prophesies a dire fate ahead as chief mate Spurlock loads the pork n fries onboard for the journey ahead.

After weeks at sea HIAB appears on the quarterdeck and declares revenge on on the Leviathan Peskie Piske for taking his Dildo. HIAB turns to ‘Roger the cabin boy’ again and later instructs Seamen Stains to get all the segments together for a good afternoons harpooning as he’d been up until 3am dreaming about Peskie Piskie

Roofie the ships brown nose said don’t worry HAIB “I’ve got your back until the bitter end”. Little knowning that dark moist place would always be his was to soon transpire. Cornish Clive the look out spotted Peskie Piskie who was intent on rocking the boat as he had done so many time before. Such was the stench of fear the crew had Ginger Marks all over them.

Spud Disciple trembles as he see’s the Peskie Piskie draw ever nearer. Harpoon in hand he turns to HIAB and says “have you tried delegating? HIAB is furious at SD for his cowardice and threatens him with the tail segment of his centipede.

HIAB grabs Roofie, Spurlock & SD and they clamber into a small pursuit craft. Pesky Piskie is too fast and anticipates meltdown. HIAB attempts to finger his dildo but all is lost as with a flick of Peskie Piskies tail he smashed HIAB’s centipede and sex toys and all. All on board were perished.

Epilogue:
The cruel sea of bytes doth hold morals, an almanac for life. 1) Go out and have a Whale of a time. 2) Enjoy yourself. 3) Don't be an arsehole. 4) Be truthful & dont use the M3 in a clapped out French wheelbarrow. 5) No dildo's.
 
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<laugh> HIAB.

Spendid tale of a Macs flipper come hotshot lawyer and wheeler dealer in exotic cars.

May the blackpool sea take their souls and oneday their message in a bottleis told around campfires as a warning.
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Har har mi hearty tis a true thing, waiting for the blubbering noises that come soon.
 
<laugh> HIAB.

Spendid tale of a Macs flipper come hotshot lawyer and wheeler dealer in exotic cars.

May the blackpool sea take their souls and oneday their message in a bottleis told around campfires as a warning.

<laugh>
 
I'm not getting involved in this nonsense.

I was just playing around on my guitar after an earlyish dinner and was actually just playing Message in a bottle, when I saw this.

Anyway, carry on!...
 
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Well done Robbie, never seen you write whole sentences before. We'll have you out of remedial class in no time if you keep up this progress. Just need to work on unnecessary apostrophes and gaining a sense of humour and you are there. Well done <applause>
 
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