Christmas Footy Match: The Lads v The 'Pede

Has hiag supplied you with enough rohypnol to get a team together?

 

Commie, unfortunately you were shot to fcuk before the game commenced, so you don’t feature and there is no point you being here.

Bye.

 

there's no point in you breathing, but you are still here.

 

Hiag and Comm:

 

Stick around till January. We'll pay 50mil for you.

 

So you can only score headers then?

 

I have a good eye for a header.

 

Don't think HIAG managed to assemble a team in the end. It was probably the tight black PVC gimp suit kit that they weren't really into.

I can just imagine it now. 'Come on lads. I'm going to need some help to get in behind and penetrate. If that doesn't work, I'll go down with a little tug.'

The lads back away from HIAG slowly ...