Caption Competition Extreme

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Hello, My name is Gladys and I'm looking for my third husband.
I'm holding these pistols to remind me where the other two went.
This would be the winner if this counted, but it might not 'cos it's still UTR's turn . . . . well done anyway, Scooby Doo <applause>
 
I'm getting ripe fruit, I'm getting plum and cherry, I'm getting ripe blackcurrent from the Shiraz grape aged in French oak, I'm getting deep chocolatey tones, powerful yet friendly and comfortable. I'm getting pissed
Who is the winner kiwi ?

My money is on Wherever <ok>
you should be a bookie woopsy

wherever it is