Here`s a few for you Billy. 20 Greatest Cricket Sledges It's been decided! After much research and drama, after a 2 week poll in which over 5000 cricket fans voted, we bring you the 20 GREATEST CRICKET SLEDGES OF ALL TIME! Unsurprisingly there are alot of Australians in this list, and coincidentally Merv Hughes seems to keep popping up... Anyway, here are the 20 greatest cricket sledges of all time as decided by you: 20. Malcolm Marshall & David Boon. Malcolm Marshall was bowling to David Boon, who was having a bit of trouble against the fast bowler and had played and missed a few times. Marshall : "Now David, are you going to get out or am I going to have to come round the wicket and kill you?". 19. Merv Hughes & Graham Gooch. Merv Hughes was all over Gooch in one test and proceeded to say: "Would you like me to bowl a piano and see if you can play that". 18. Rod Marsh & Ian Botham. In an Ashes match Botham arrived at the wicket to a bit of cheek from the Aussie keeper. Marsh : "So how's your wife and my kid's?". Botham: "Wife's fine. Kid's are ******ed". 17. Robin Smith & Merv Hughes. In the 1989 Ashes series Big Merv was giving Smith a few problems. After playing and missing a Merv delivery, Big Merv snapped: "You can't ****ing bat". Next ball Smith proceeded to belt Hughes to the fence for four runs and replied: "Hey Merv! We make a good pair. I can't ****ing bat and you can't ****ing bowl!". 16. Merv Hughes & Javed Miandad. During a test between Pakistan and Australia in 1991 Miandad tried to sledge Merv: "Merv you are a big, fat bus conductor". Only a few balls later Merv dismissed Miandad, ran past him and shouted: "Tickets please!". 15. Ian Healy & Arjuna Ranatunga. The Australians were getting frustrated while trying to get the wicket of the portly Arjuna Ranatunga of Sri Lanka. Various tactics were tried and failed until Healy came up with a winner: "Put a Mars Bar on a good length and that should do it!". 14. Herschelle Gibbs & Steve Waugh. In the 1999 World Cup Australia needed to beat South Africa to keep their tournament hopes alive. Steve Waugh was on 56* and leading Aus to victory when he gifted Gibbs a simple catch. Gibbs went to celebrate the catch but instead dropped it, leaving Waugh to retort: "You've just dropped the World Cup". He was right too, Aussie went on to win the game and the tournament, knocking out South Africa in the process. 13. Merv Hughes & Viv Richards. During a test match in Jamaica, Hughes continued to stare at Richards after each delivery. He never spoke a word but sure enough after every delivery there was a stare. Viv Richards: "Don't you be staring at me, man. This is my island, my culture. And in my culture we just bowl". Hughes replied with a ripper : "In my culture we just say **** off". 12. Mark Waugh & Adam Parore. Waugh: "I remember you from a couple of years ago. You were **** then and you're ****en useless now!". To which Parore replied: "Yeah that's me. And I remember you were dating that old, ugly slut. I see you've married her now. You dumb ****". 11. Merv Hughes & Robin Smith. Merv was bowling a few crackers that Smith couldn't even get an edge to. Merv: "If you turn the bat over you'll get the instructions mate". And the Top 10... 10. Jamie Siddons & Steve Waugh. In a Sheffield Shield match Steve Waugh was taking his time getting ready to face his first ball. Taking guard, scratching out his mark, looking at the field settings. Jamie Siddons decided enough was enough and remarked: "For ****'s sake, mate, it's not a ****en test match!". To which Waugh replied: "Of course it's not... You're here". 9. Ian Healy & Arjuna Ranatunga. During a One-dayer between Australia and Sri Lanka Ranatunga decided he needed a runner. The stump microphone then picked up the following sledge from Healy: "You don't get a runner for being an overweight, fat ****". 8. Glenn McGrath & Ramnaresh Sarwan. Surprised this didn't rank higher. Shortly after McGrath's wife had been diagnosed with breast cancer, the Australians were playing a test match against the West Indies. McGrath: "What does Brian Lara's dick taste like?". Sarwan: "Why don't you ask your wife?". McGrath then lost the plot: "If you ever mention my wife again, I'll ****en rip your ****en throat out". 7. Fred Trueman. An Australian batsman was walking onto the field, opened the gate and before he could shut it, Trueman remarked: "Don't bother shutting it, son, you won't be there long enough". 6. Ravi Shastri & Mike Whitney. Mike Whitney was on the field as a sub fielder while Shastri was batting. Shastri hits the ball to Whitney and contemplates a single. Whitney throws the ball in and says: "Stay in your crease or I'll break your ****en head". Shastri replies: "If you could bowl as well as you talk you wouldn't be the ****en 12th man!". 5. Daryll Cullinan & Shane Warne. Cullinan was well known as being a bit of a bunny to Warne's bowling. The 2 hadn't played each other in some time so when Cullinan walked out to bat, Warne couldn't resist heckling him: "I've been waiting two years for another chance at you". Cullinan got him back with a ripper: "Looks like you spent it eating..." 4. Sunil Gavaskar & Viv Richards. In one test between the West Indians and the Indians Sunil Gavaskar decided to drop down to no.4 from his usual opening position. Malcolm Marshall then proceeded to dismiss Gaekwad and Vengsarkar for no score. When Gavaskar came out to bat Richards said: "Man it don't matter where you come in, the score is still zero!" 3. Fred Trueman & Raman Subba Row. Fred Trueman was bowling and got an edge from the batsman which went between Row's legs, who was fielding at slip. At the end of the over, Row runs over to Trueman and says: "Sorry Fred, I should've kept my legs closed". Trueman: "So should your mother". 2. Mark Waugh & James Ormond. James Ormond came out to bat in a match with Australia. Mark Waugh, at slip, let rip: "What are you doing out here? You're too **** to play for England!" Ormond replied: "Maybe so, but at least I'm the best player in my family". Drumroll please! The number 1 cricket sledge of all time as voted by you, is: 1. Viv Richards & Greg Thomas. In a county match in England, Thomas was bowling to Richards and getting a few to whizz past the bat. After Richards played and missed another one, Thomas said: "It's red, it's round. Now ****en hit it!". This obviously angered Richards who proceeded to hit the next ball out of the ground. Richards: "You know what it looks like now go and get it."
19,18,5 & 3 for me. Absolute gems. Merv Hughes was a real character. Always had plenty to say. Dam good bowler aswell.
Of course! Unless England are playing Wales in sport, I would want them (England) to win - just as I did when I was at Wembley on 30th July 1966!
His stretches he used to do to the crowd were bloody brilliant! You don't get blokes like that in sport anymore.
Nice one Taff. Bet you're still a bit spritely compared to our @The Relic He was a brickie on Hadrian's Wall
My Dad took a picnic stool into the ground so that I could stand on it to see the game. The tickets cost 25 shillings each - £1.25 - he still has the two "stubs"!
My memory is not what it was but some excellent sledging - I think it was Zimbabwe v Aussies and one of the Aussie fast bowlers said to one of their players "how did you get so fat?" the batsman replied "cause every time I sh*g your missus she gives me a biscuit" another one was Fred Trueman to a batsman who kept playing and missing "Just hold yer bat out there lad and I'll hit it"
I've watch alot of cricket and as long as that choir boy I don't take any risks Cook is captain I can't see us beating the Aussies. We have some talent but I don't think we will cope against their seam bowlers. Johnson and Starc are in my opinion better than Anderson and Broad. Their batting attack looks stronger on paper; Warner is immense, can take away the game from you in the first session. Smith is on fire and Clarke on his day is brilliant (although he has a suspect back). One thing going for the English is that we have a very young side, compared to the Aussies. I think we will lose this series but we will be a different proposition in the next decade
