Match Report: Ipswich 0 -4 Anyteam FC
OMGWTF WE HAVE A FAN!!!!!! We're not sure if he's wandered in to shelter from the cold, or whether he's actually died in his seat, but we can definitely confirm that there was at least a body in the stands! The team were dreadful and thoroughly deserved to lose, but you knew that already. More updates on this exciting development coming your way soon!
Update: After the game, we spoke to Mick McCarthy:
"So Mick, pretty much the result we all expected. Have you anything to say about the reports a fan may have been at the game today?"
"Well we played with plenty o' industry, but t'better team won in t'end. There were someone in the stands for sure. The players came in at 'alf-time moanin' that some geezer was yelling at 'em to keep t'ball on t'deck, that they was too tall, and needed t'look more spanish. It put 'em right orff."
___
Sorry, it's a good job I have no plans for a career in journalism!