Join the Army/Navy then? Money - Check, Sea and travel the world - Check, fight for country - check... Beautiful babes, some of the most attractive women in the world are from the NE of England, so just make sure you're ship shape for going out on the Toon Sorted, who's next?
? Is it fair enough to say you're strange? What you clearly want is an Xbox and COD then... You can relive the glory days...