WITHNAIL AND I HOME IF YOU LIKE WITHNAIL... ABOUT THE FILM CAST & CREDITS SCRIPTQUOTESWITHNAIL MARWOOD DANNY MONTY JAKE DRINKING GAME WITHNAIL AND I DVD VIDEO CLIPS WATCH ONLINE OTHER MERCHANDISE LOCATIONS TRAILER MISCELLANEOUS LINKS LIKE THIS SITE? Withnail & I - Famous Lines by Withnail ⢠We want the finest wines available to humanity, we want them here, and we want them now. ⢠We've gone on holiday by mistake. ⢠I feel like a pig shat in my head. ⢠I must have some booze. I demand to have some booze. The official screenplay includes quotes that didn't make the film. ⢠I want something's flesh. ⢠Don't threaten me with a dead fish. ⢠I'm going to pull your head off, because I don't like your head. ⢠I have a heart condition. If you hit me, it's murder. ⢠Look at that. "Accident Blackspot"? These aren't accidents. They're throwing themselves into the road gladly. Throwing themselves into the road to escape all this hideousness. ⢠Warm up? We may as well sit round this cigarette. This is ridiculous. We'll be found dead in here next spring. ⢠What happened to my cigar commercial? What happened to my agent? Bastard must have died. ⢠These are the sort of windows faces look in at. ⢠Right, here's the plan. First, we go in there and get wrecked, then we eat a pork pie, then we drop a couple of Surmontil-50's each, means we'll miss out on Monday and come up smiling Tuesday morning. ⢠This place has become impossible. Nothing to eat, freezing cold and now a madman on the prowl outside with eels. ⢠If I ever see that silage-heap hanging about up here, I'll take the bastard axe to him. Bastards! ⢠Throw yourself into the road, darling - you haven't got a chance. ⢠I fail to see my family's of any interest to you. I've absolutely no interest in yours. I dislike relatives in general and in particular mine. ⢠I must say, that represents a level of hypocrisy in you that I'd previously suspected, but not noticed due to your highly evasive skills. ⢠Why can't I have an audition? It's ridiculous. I've been to drama school. I'm good looking. I tell you, I've a **** sight more talent that half the rubbish that gets on television. Why can't I get on television?
Next time i throw a dog a bone, i dont wanna hear if it tastes good.....Now listen here you ****ing fringe, next time you stop me while I'm walking I'll cut your ****ing Jacobs off.
It's interesting to see what the Americans think are the best movie quotes - very few non-Hollywood efforts on their list.... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/AFI's_100_Years...100_Movie_Quotes
'Shut up mate, you're fat and I'll throw in in the river' Ray Winstone - Love, Honour and Obey. 'Write it out 100 times before morning, or I'll cut your balls off' John Cleese - Life of Brian. 'You're only supposed to blow the bloody doors off'. No explanation needed.
more classic withnail, âI have of late - but wherefore I know not - lost all my mirth; and indeed it goes so heavily with my disposition that this goodly frame, the earth, seems to me a sterile promontory, this most excellent canopy, the air, look you, this brave o'erhanging firmament, this majestical roof fretted with golden fire, why, it appeareth nothing to me but a foul and pestilent congregation of vapours. What a piece of work is a man! How noble in reason! How infinite in faculties! How like an angel in apprehension. How like a god! The beauty of the world! The paragon of animals! And yet, to me, what is this quintessence of dust? Man delights not me: no, nor women neither. Nor women neither
Harry, let's face it. And I'm not being funny. I mean no disrespect, but you're a c*nt. You're a c*nt now, and you've always been a c*nt. And the only thing that's going to change is that you're going to be an even bigger c*nt. Maybe have some more c*nt kids.
"is this some white c*nt's joke that black c*nts don't get? 'Cause I'm not ****ing laughing Nicholas" "If the milk turns out to be sour, I ain't the kinda pussy to drink it." "Rory? Yeah I know Rory. He's not to be underestimated, you've got to look past the hair and the cute, cuddly thing - it's all a deceptive facade. A few nights ago Rory's Roger iron's rusted, so he's gone to the local battle-cruiser to catch the end of his footer. Nobody is watching the custard so he turns the channel over. A fat man's north opens and he wanders over and turns the Liza over. 'Now **** off and watch it somewhere else.' Rory knows claret is imminent, but he doesn't want to miss the end of the game; so, calm as a coma, he stands and picks up a fire extinguisher and he walks straight past the jam rolls who are ready for action, then he plonks it outside the entrance. He then orders an Aristotle of the most ping pong tiddly in the nuclear sub and switches back to his footer. 'That's ****ing it,' says the guy. 'That's ****ing what' says Rory. Rory gobs out a mouthful of booze covering fatty; he then flicks a flaming match into his bird's nest and the man's lit up like a leaky gas pipe. Rory, unfazed, turned back to his game. His team's won too. Four-nil." "It's been emotional"
"I love the smell of napalm in the morning" Robert Duvall in Apocalyse Now. "Your a big man,but your out of shape"Michael Caine in Get Carter. "The ****ing mafia,i'll **** em"Bob Hoskins in The Long Good Friday." "Today i entered the most profitable business in the world,the murder business" any guesses?
Pool Attendant - They kept it all incognito. They're gonna collect the body in an ice cream van Harold - There's a lot of dignity in that, isn't there ? Going out like a raspberry ripple.
I don't want no teenage queen, I just want my M-14. If I die in the combat zone, Box me up and ship me home. Pin my medals upon my chest, Tell my mom I've done my best.
"What if I told you insane was working fifty hours a week in some office for fifty years at the end of which they tell you to piss off; ending up in some retirement village hoping to die before suffering the indignity of trying to make it to the toilet on time? Wouldn't you consider that to be insane?" "He's a font of misplaced rage. Name your cliché; Mother held him too much or not enough, last picked at kickball, late night sneaky uncle, whatever. Now he's so angry moments of levity actually cause him pain; gives him headaches. Happiness, for that gentleman, hurts." ["Sweet Home Alabama" plays in background] "Define irony. Bunch of idiots dancing on a plane to a song made famous by a band that died in a plane crash." Garland Greene
