Your not confused Abber, you're a decent Human Being and as such this upsets you, me too 
I'm raging too right now. Remember I was angry and upset when I came back from my last 'trip'?. After thousands of pages of reports, countless meetings, endless investigations and of course hundreds of expensive legal hours, the exact same thing happened again end of last month.
I'm sick to the stomach, all I want to do is walk away, go work in a book shop somewhere but I cant. If I do then I leave people I've worked and lived with for over 20 years. It bends me double just thinking about that, I cant leave people who are like brothers and sisters to me. Because they come from everywhere, if I leave, I may not see some of them again ever and that hurts too much.
If I go back then I have to bite the bullet and effectively 'accept conditions'. Its ripping me in two and I don't know how to put myself together right now. I've taken myself away from Swans forum too because I'm getting irritated over fekkin nothing
Right now I wish I was Pink

I'm raging too right now. Remember I was angry and upset when I came back from my last 'trip'?. After thousands of pages of reports, countless meetings, endless investigations and of course hundreds of expensive legal hours, the exact same thing happened again end of last month.
I'm sick to the stomach, all I want to do is walk away, go work in a book shop somewhere but I cant. If I do then I leave people I've worked and lived with for over 20 years. It bends me double just thinking about that, I cant leave people who are like brothers and sisters to me. Because they come from everywhere, if I leave, I may not see some of them again ever and that hurts too much.
If I go back then I have to bite the bullet and effectively 'accept conditions'. Its ripping me in two and I don't know how to put myself together right now. I've taken myself away from Swans forum too because I'm getting irritated over fekkin nothing
Right now I wish I was Pink
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.....fk em and theyre gold plated Nazi butt plugs.