The it’s ok to not be ok thread

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I'm ok as a whole but I think life had finally caught up with me!

We're away for our anniversary which includes alcohol and a hot tub and tonight I'm starting to feel old!

The wife and I have been tighter for about 23 years and 21 years married on Friday. Now after a few drinks and sitting in the hot tub thinking and talking about things we've been through, it finally seriously dawned on me that I'm old! I'm 58 in August but until recently I always thought of myself as a hell of a lot younger!

Now with talking things through, the step daughter who I've known since she was 9 is mother with a lad who's 11 in October, my step son is 34 in October. We've talked about the 2 cats we had who are no longer with us as well as the dog the daughter has decided is half ours as well as there's and I'm feeling old!

My mam always told me not to "get auld cos it's not good" and she's right - where's the last 30 years gone?

Working shifts all my life haven't helped and it's coming to the stage where I want to enjoy my life. I've got a great wife, beautiful street daughter who reminds me of me at times (which is bloody scary!!) a step son who's doing roughly the same things as me but better and a grandson who I adore. And even though everything has been there in front of me, it seems more relevant than before - hence the feeling old bit!

Does life do this on purpose? Allow you to think of yourself one way then all of a sudden drop everything in front of you?

Anyways I thank anyone who had made it this far
I'm a very similar age mate, 58 in August.

I read something years ago... "Why is it called life?" and the answer was "Because sh1t, f*ck and c*nt were already taken".

It does feel that way at times and as soon as you get your way through one challenge another one slaps you in the back of the head. In the past 5 years we've had my wifes mother pass, nearly lost the house, wife's liver failure, wifes father pass.

Given how quickly things change i'm seriously considering early retirement so as to purely enjoy time with my wife who's been fortunate enough to be given a 2nd chance. She's still struggling mentally and physically with all the medication and constant adjustments and it's got me wondering whether losing time to work is worth it anymore.
 
I'm a very similar age mate, 58 in August.

I read something years ago... "Why is it called life?" and the answer was "Because sh1t, f*ck and c*nt were already taken".

It does feel that way at times and as soon as you get your way through one challenge another one slaps you in the back of the head. In the past 5 years we've had my wifes mother pass, nearly lost the house, wife's liver failure, wifes father pass.

Given how quickly things change i'm seriously considering early retirement so as to purely enjoy time with my wife who's been fortunate enough to be given a 2nd chance. She's still struggling mentally and physically with all the medication and constant adjustments and it's got me wondering whether losing time to work is worth it anymore.

I'm finding that I'm enjoying the time away from work more and more. I've watched my parents fade away from the people I knew growing up, my dad with Parkinson's and my mam with dementia. I think that's why I want to enjoy times with the wife and the family.
 
Todays is father's day, a day to celebrate dads both here and those that have passed.

Having lost dad last year, today is a blessing and a curse, a blessing im here and had a great day, a curse that dad isnt......

You know what makes more sense these days? The title of this thread. Its really is ok to not be ok, it really is ok to admit weakness and when your struggling.

If anyone worries about being judged for being weak or not wanting to speak up, read this thread and see how many people you have that will look out for you, that will be there to offer advice or a friendly comment.

Love to you all
 
Todays is father's day, a day to celebrate dads both here and those that have passed.

Having lost dad last year, today is a blessing and a curse, a blessing im here and had a great day, a curse that dad isnt......

You know what makes more sense these days? The title of this thread. Its really is ok to not be ok, it really is ok to admit weakness and when your struggling.

If anyone worries about being judged for being weak or not wanting to speak up, read this thread and see how many people you have that will look out for you, that will be there to offer advice or a friendly comment.

Love to you all
All the best Chunk mate.
 
Todays is father's day, a day to celebrate dads both here and those that have passed.

Having lost dad last year, today is a blessing and a curse, a blessing im here and had a great day, a curse that dad isnt......

You know what makes more sense these days? The title of this thread. Its really is ok to not be ok, it really is ok to admit weakness and when your struggling.

If anyone worries about being judged for being weak or not wanting to speak up, read this thread and see how many people you have that will look out for you, that will be there to offer advice or a friendly comment.

Love to you all
Brilliant post that mate, and couldn't agree more.
Your last paragraph really rings true, and it speaks volumes of the posters we have on this forum.
All the best to you mate, and all the best to all the Dads, past and present.
X
 
Todays is father's day, a day to celebrate dads both here and those that have passed.

Having lost dad last year, today is a blessing and a curse, a blessing im here and had a great day, a curse that dad isnt......

You know what makes more sense these days? The title of this thread. Its really is ok to not be ok, it really is ok to admit weakness and when your struggling.

If anyone worries about being judged for being weak or not wanting to speak up, read this thread and see how many people you have that will look out for you, that will be there to offer advice or a friendly comment.

Love to you all
Take care Chunk, life can be difficult at times and no one should be judged for reaching out <ok>
 
I've felt mostly out of this all today tbh.

Despite living with my Dad, at Allendale Cottages, I never really knew him. He was a hewer, on the coal face, at various pits from Morrison Busty to Hamsterly. He'd come back from his shift and I'd meet him off the pit bus or walk up with him carrying his helmet. We'd never talk but, sometimes, I'd hold his hand.

Other men would nod to him, say 'What fettle Tommy?' and ruffle my hair ... 'All reet bonny lad?'

He never took me to a match, never had much to say and drank his wages so we rarely had enough to eat.

But I loved my Dad and had a drink to him tonight, his photo is on my side table so he knows.
 
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