Off Topic It's rare that I ever give anyone advice ...

... but here's some.

Over the last year I've lost friends who've been part of my life forever, it just keeps getting harder.

Tom Lynn, Keith Laing, Pete Little, Alan Crago (Mr RAWhite.) etc.

After the Villa match I was at the funeral of Pete Little, ex-Seaham, who I'd known in Mansfield since 1972.

Pete was one of the hundreds of children, like me, who arrived in the East Midlands when they started closing the Durham coalfields. We all gradually found each other, hitched/bussed to games then afforded cars or hired furniture vans, minibuses and eventually coaches.

We thought those days would last forever but eventually lads moved away, had families, stopped going/started going again, etc. Some of us keep in touch, some have passed and some just vanished but, at Pete's funeral, loads I'd have trusted my life with appeared and it was like yesterday again.

It was all very emotional and, sadly, I missed the wake because I had to go straight to Newark for my train back to Edinburgh and work today, but I was thinking on the train, and thought it was ridiculous that we've allowed all that friendship, all those adventures and memories to go unremarked year after year.

So we've all decided to have a reunion on the day of Pete's funeral when we can have a meal/drink/reminisce, bring old programmes, photos, newspaper cuttings, etc, tell the stories we've all heard a hundred times, laugh at how daft we were and how we supported the Lads from Southend to Carlisle and Cardiff to Hull.

For anyone who's seen the Green Mile you'll know, at the end, Tom Hanks is the old man who can never die. He's doomed to live alone because everyone he loved has passed and his only friend is Mr Jingles, the scruffy little mouse that escaped being stamped on and avoiding the electric chair ...

... well, sorry to say but that's you. One day you'll be the last man standing and wondering where your mates have all gone.

So my advice is to find the time, in whatever way, to meet up with 'Rudy' ...

... it's easier not to bother but John Prine might convince you otherwise, I hope so.

 

Lovely post mate, poignant. Do us blokes value our friendships as we should?

A couple of weeks ago I found out, in passing, an old friend had passed away a couple of months earlier. I am awful at keeping in touch and only I was to blame for not knowing. But it affected me. We shared some good times.

It had made me reflect a bit, on how I should make more time, for the old times. I find it hard to do that, but your post makes me realise the importance. I would echo your sentiments and encourage younger posters to not assume past pals will always be there.

 

If our friends aren't important enough to find time for, what are they ...

... it's easier to just think they'll always be there, but all of a sudden they're gone for good.

 

Smug that is a lovely post. We should all make the effort. Life is so short and time waits for no one. Ive lost a few mates recently and it is not easy. Cherish the times and make the memories. I think a lot on here are in our twighlight years

 

Life is far too short. I have been getting increasingly wound up in nonsense with work, my lads application for secondary school etc so **** it. I’ve been putting off catchups with mates for too long…. I should know better as a lot of my closest mates have passed away.

so thanks for the inspiration Smug.

 

We're planning a meet up for Fulham mate, with or without tickets ...

... be great to see you and Sid there.

 

Nice words mate. Life is strange isn’t it. We meet people along the way who become life long friends but we then all go on to lead different lives and although the friendships remain, “life gets in the way” is a line that often gets said. It takes something like the loss of a dear friend to make you realise that life is short and precious. Hope you’re doing ok mate

 

I am aiming to go, and with my mate Matt. Same - with or without tickets. If drinking it might not be a day for junior . See you then if not before

 

Nice post…

 

Temperance Bar most likely mate ...

... hoping to get Dave Ashfield there for his last game.

 

Great post mate. Like many on here have lost to many mates lately. You do just think they will.always be there but sadly as we know all to well that's not the case. Take care might see you at forest if you're there.

 

Cheers Whitty, yes I'm driving down for that and will definitely see you there.

I'm meeting the Notts lads here if you're around https://www.nottscountyfc.co.uk/the-nest

If not let me know where you are, been a while since the Argyll.

 

To long mate. Ill pop in and catch up.

 

Great post mate.

 

Nice post mate xx

 

Nice post mate. And you're right. We can all run along and think it will all last forever.

But we all go to funerals that affect us like Pete's clearly affected you, and too often shrug them off. That's part of life of course, you have to live. But so is remembering, and savouring what you have.

Well said.

 

Nice post

I relate to this with my mum - when I was recovering from my cancer operation my mum had a stroke which unfortunately led to her passing. We got on so well but there are still things I never had the chance to say - and boy even though I am getting on in life I miss the chance to catch up and listen to her wisdom. (I am sure she would say you never listened to me anyway). It has been over 12 years since then but I still miss that chance to pick up the phone/call in for a cuppa

 

What a heart warming post Smug, I have lost a few good souls over the last few years and it does make me ponder from time to time what I could have done better over time gone by. Fact is I cant do anything about it but one things for certain we should treasure those close to us that little bit more but more importantly tell them how you feel. Thats my biggest downfall, havent got the guts to tell people how much I love them, I do with my kids and grandkids mind but if I told one of the lads I loved them it might draw quite a response. I should tell the wife I love her more as well instead of around 9pm every Xmas day

 

Reminds me of the old joke,

‘You never tell me you love me any more’.

‘I told you on our wedding day and said I’d let you know if the situation ever changes …

… so far, so good’.