When I was young I was scared of the dark. Now when I see my electric bill I am scared of the lights....
I was on a date last night and she said to me "I only slept with 3 guys before meeting you". I said "Bloody hell love, I was only half an hour late!".....
My friend sometimes puts her favourite chocolate bars in different wrappers. She got a bit mixed up yesterday and got her snickers in a twix.