Blokes working on the top floor of a 10 story building site, one takes a s**t out the window. s**t drops down, hits the foreman walking at the bottom of the building, He goes running up to the top floor. Where everybody on that floor denies doing it or see anything. Foreman looks out of the window, starts shouting, what's that on path 1m out at the bottom of the building, s**t What's that on the scaffolding pole 500mm out half way down the building, s**t What's that on the widow sill s**t So what does that tell me? One bloke replies, is it the building is out of plumb.
A farmer in Norfolk has perfected the art of growing vibrators. He says that he doesn't have any trouble growing them, but he has a problem with squatters.
Geordie went to the doctors with a bad leg. The doctor asks, 'Can you walk?' Geordie looks shocked and says, 'Work, I cannet even wark.' (Apologies to anyone from down south.)