Recent content by Dark Helmet

Have you packed it in on here then?

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Steve Wilson Warren Joyce Mark Greaves Gregor Rich Rob Dewhurst Mark Edwards Mark Quigley Richie Peacock Dean Windass Duane Derby Peter Beardsley

That's ****ing brilliant. I never have a bean bag chair when I need one, bollocks like that are the future.

Deliver some milk tray to Oscar pistoris at half two in the morning.

Boom Boom Boom by the vengaboys Reach by S club Seven No way by Vanilla Anything by Milli Vanilli

I'd do Kate moss first, then I'd last a bit longer with Rihanna. If I did her first I'd shoot my muck after about three strokes, if I've emptied the pump action yoghurt slinger first I might get to as many as seven!

****ing hell, if were dying relatives of people at club have some sort of reflection on the club then can we bring John Terrys parents into it?

Heard a bit of chat bout Swansea being punished for fielding a weakened side. I honestly cannot fathom why he felt the need to field a weakened team, and I can see why your fans feel hard done by. That should be it though. Swansea named a 25 man squad for the league, the manager should be able...

Brandon Rodgers? Who the **** is that? Brendan Rodgers, his surname is actually a verb. It took me a while to figure that out, I thought it was a posessive noun in the sentence "Brendan Rodgers Liverpool players" but it turns out he likes to do some of them in the rusty bullet hole.

I once snagged a lass who claimed to be Ronaldos ex, didn't beleive her but then she showed me a load of dodgy pictures of him. Still not sure. She was kinky as ****, she kept moaning "oh daddy" and "**** me daddy". I didn't like that to be honest, made me feel all dirty.

I think arsenals invincibles were better than every Chelsea team there has ever been. Especially last seasons.

Is there a Champions league QF draw thread yet.?

What!! Let the ****ing ref sort it out then, don't go kicking kids! What did Hazard think he was going to get from the extra ten seconds, that goal that would have clinched it for you?

The lad was lucky there wasn't an air rifle nearby....