4 thick slices of bacon, well done, 4 decent sausages, two slices of toast, 6 scrambled eggs, half a tin of Heinz beans, two hash browns, couple of plum tomatoes from the tin, black pudding if it's the good stuff and a mug of tea. If anybody tries to come near you with mushrooms proceed to bang the full plate of breakfast into their face, break their legs and launch a two footed lunge into their balls.
Oh yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Pints of lager, any wine, g&t, barcardi & coke. She can drink me under the table.
What a blinking waste of all of that brekky . . . . you could just say 'no, thank you' (or tell them to **** off) Then there would be the court case, of course
****ing hell. A few calories in that. Thats ****ing massive. Id need to hibernate for a week if i shoveled all that down my grid.
Not a problem for me mate, calories are my friend. I wake up and have a shake of protein powder, oats, peanut butter, banana and almond milk, then a litre of water, go to the gym, another shake, two slices of Rye toast with 6 eggs (three yolks removed) and about 75g of smoked salmon and half an avocado. Roughly 1,500 calories dusted off before 9am every day. A breakfast like I've listed above will be about the same, only it'll taste much nicer and I won't go to the gym after eating half. Today I needed a bad dump when I woke up and it's made me slightly out of tune for the day, so I just had porridge and a banana.
I don't look at it as food mate, it's just numbers. I had some proper food on Sunday mind, got a takeaway, Chicken Tikka Madras with Pilau Rice, Peshwari naan, poppadoms and dips and half of my Mrs' King Prawn Bhuna.
Now that sounds much better. Strange i eat loads of really spicy food with loads of chillis. Yet Indians wipe me out big time. Which is a twat, as i love scranning them. So usually stick to the girly curries. No Madras or Vindalo's for this lily livered soft arse twat.
My brekky last Sat before golf at the Harvester cost £6.50. 2 sausage, 2 bacon, 2 eggs (fried) mushrooms, tomatoes, beans 2 hash browns, nice n crispy. Black pudding and a couple of slices of toast washed down with a brew. My mate had a pint of cider with his. Waitress came over when we had finished and asked if we wanted more as it was an all you can eat brekky, tip top it was.
Two is never enough, unless it's mushrooms. I'd have choked the waiter to sleep for putting mushrooms in my life.
