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Off Topic Please Stand By...

Discussion in 'Hull City' started by Steven Toast, Jun 2, 2015.

  1. Carmine Galante.

    Carmine Galante. Well-Known Member

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    I think you'll find that that's meant to be you.

    Chazz PM'd me and told me, something to do with you having the gayest dog in Christendom.

    It's a Yorkshire Terrier FFS.

    The chosen pooch of transvestites and old biddies.

    Of which, you are both.


    BOOM SHAKALAK!!!!!!

    Straight back at yer!!!!!!!!!
     
    #141
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  2. look_back_in_amber

    look_back_in_amber Well-Known Member

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    Nope, it was simply a case of nature over nurture, she seemed to have an imbalance in her brain, we tried everything we could to sort her out but to no avail. We bought her sister from the same litter, obviously at the same time, and she never had a bad bone in her body. It was really distressing to have her euthanised but, over a three year period, we'd tried every other option. What makes it even worse is that she was a stunning looking dog, and healthy in every other respect.
     
    #142
  3. Happy Tiger

    Happy Tiger Well-Known Member

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    Half Yorker half Russell. Yorkussel. He's the size of a big Russel.

    ****zu? That's Chinese for turd covered in glitter.

    You got a man bag to carry it in when you head to Gap for a new salmon coloured jumper??
     
    #143
  4. Chazz Rheinhold

    Chazz Rheinhold Well-Known Member

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    Ye same as mine. She was fine with other dogs but strangers especially blokes, kill mode.
     
    #144
  5. DMD

    DMD Eh? Forum Moderator

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    Get the two together and you could let people know Jack ****.
     
    #145
  6. Carmine Galante.

    Carmine Galante. Well-Known Member

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    Shi-tzu's were protectors of the ancient Shaolin temples.

    They were chosen for their loyalty, courage and tenacity in battle.

    They were the trusted companions of the fearsome Shaolin warrior monks. The bond, as legend goes, between the Shi-Tzu warrior dogs and their masters has gone down in Chinese folk lore. After all Shi-Tzu does translate to 'savage and noble beast'.


    Compare that to your mincing Yorkshire Terrier. Preferred companion of Jimmy Saville, Nora Batty and you.
     
    #146
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  7. DMD

    DMD Eh? Forum Moderator

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    The Shih Tzu was considered a “sleeve dog” as was the Pekinese.

    The Shih Tzu was a treasured companion. The breed found much favor with the Empress Dowager.

    They lived inside the palace and were treated as small humans. They were often considered to be re-incarnated family members.

    Their "job" was probably to accompany, entertain and keep the ladies of the court warm in cold winter months.
     
    #147
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  8. Carmine Galante.

    Carmine Galante. Well-Known Member

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    Spoil sport.
     
    #148
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  9. DMD

    DMD Eh? Forum Moderator

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    <laugh>

    I reckon the emperor was okay until the enemy realised they could just throw the 'lion dog' over the wall if it bothered them.
     
    #149
  10. Carmine Galante.

    Carmine Galante. Well-Known Member

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    Try throwing my 'Lion Dog' over a wall.

    He'd lick you into submission before snuggling in for a power cuddle.

    You wouldn't have the heart.
     
    #150
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  11. DMD

    DMD Eh? Forum Moderator

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    It'd be the fear of your Mrs getting angry at losing her foot warmer that'd scare me too.
     
    #151
  12. Happy Tiger

    Happy Tiger Well-Known Member

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    So the chinese Dame Maggie Smiths had them?

    Look at this...he's poised to rip the **** out of any thing that comes through the letterbox.
     
    #152
  13. Happy Tiger

    Happy Tiger Well-Known Member

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    Ok this time ...
     

    Attached Files:

    #153
  14. Chazz Rheinhold

    Chazz Rheinhold Well-Known Member

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    Cocker Hoop for two??
     
    #154
  15. Carmine Galante.

    Carmine Galante. Well-Known Member

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    Not in my house.

    I've got one of those wire mesh boxes that catches the post.

    Charles did catch a mouse once though, well when I say that he found a dead mouse in our garden and barked at it before running away.

    I love him and I don't care how camp he is.
     
    #155
  16. Carmine Galante.

    Carmine Galante. Well-Known Member

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    <laugh>

    **** the bed, I though Charles looked camp.

    Oh sorry, you're pooch is a lady dog.
     
    #156
  17. Ernie Shackleton

    Ernie Shackleton Well-Known Member

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    It was suggested that I fit one of those.

    By Nick Clegg or somesuch similar tosser.


    I'll explain.

    A Liberal Democrat leaflet deliverer person stuck her hand through my letter box in a cack-handed attempt to foist her insipid centre ground nonsense upon me.

    I've got a killer terrier who knows not the difference between a Lib-Dem hand and, say, an anemic vole.

    He went for it. Sic, boy, sic.


    Stitches needed. Missus mortified and embarrassed.

    Ernie's view on returning? Any ****er who comes uninvited onto my property and sticks their mitt through my letter box is breaking and entering in my view and deserves everything they get.

    FFS, Ellewoods would have probably shot her.



    Local Lib-Dem councillor came round and suggested I fit said wire basket.

    My response was succinct, considered and clearly expressed.

    And ran to two words.

    And seven letters.


    Apparently I'm now on an 'avoid this man at all costs' list at Lib-Dem HQ.


    And they've threatened to send me a quite sternly worded letter.


    I quake in my boots.
     
    #157
  18. FILEYseadog

    FILEYseadog Well-Known Member

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    My dog is a Refugee from the kill centre in Brasov ..Romania .
     
    #158
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  19. Happy Tiger

    Happy Tiger Well-Known Member

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    He's like a coiled spring.

    That's asleep.

    He can sense the postie tho so when a letter comes through, he's straight up, shoots at the door, bites the mail once then goes back to sleep.

    Waiting.
     
    #159
  20. Altrincham Tiger

    Altrincham Tiger Well-Known Member

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    **** off!

    Has no-one got a Night Stalker?
     
    #160

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