From a ramshackle camp in the woods outside Calais, a Syrian refugee made his 18th attempt to stow away in a lorry bound for the UK. Here he tells how he ended up in a tank of melted chocolate - an experience that almost killed him.We met the migrant smuggler at the petrol garage at 2am. The lorries going to the UK were always parked there, near the train station. We usually tried to sneak on board at night, when the drivers were asleep and there weren't so many police around. There were 25 of us in all, so he split us into groups. Each group was going to sneak on to a different lorry.The smuggler chose seven of the tallest people. Five of us were Syrian, and there were two Egyptian guys as well. At 25, I was the youngest. The others were all in their mid-30s.We knew that our lorry was going to the UK because the smuggler had seen a card that gets posted on the lorries when they come into the waiting area. He's a Kurdish guy from Iraq and has been doing this for years. I left Syria with nothing, so I'd been working for him in Calais almost two months to pay my way. He said that these lorries, the ones that carry liquids, go straight on to the train without getting X-rayed.The driver was still asleep in the cab, so we had to climb up on to the tank quietly. The hatch on top was locked, but the smuggler cut the wires. We had no idea what was in there, but as soon as he opened it the smell hit us. It was chocolate. We were going to sneak into the UK in a heated tank of liquid chocolate. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-32119449
For the first time ever I'm going to ask the papes a favour.... Will you please ignore monica, thank you. (unless he's one of yours)
Don't tell me how to spell my made up hilarious quips ya daft ****, if I was copying anybody, I wouldn't have made it up myself
I once got licked all over by three blind wimmin. In the confusion they started licking each other too. In hindsight I suspect at least one of them wasn't blind. Perhaps it was the fanny smell that attracted them because I got left out entirely. True story #33265