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DevAdvocate

DevAdvocate

Gigging bassist
Jan 21, 2010
63,752
13,061
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Up my own arse
I've decided to allow all of you to make use of all my life experience and start an Agony Column (No, not my joke book) , so feel free to avail yourself of my vast life experience and ask me to help you with your problems.

A problem shared is a problem halved.

Fire away.
 
Dear Aunty Dev,

My priest recently admonished me because I regularly commit the sin of Onan. His argument is that I should be storing my seed up to make God's babies. However, I have several jam jars full of the stuff in my fridge. Is the dirty beast correct, or have I got him on a technicality?

Regards,

N. Edmonds
 
Tits McGee said:
Dear Aunty Dev,

My priest recently admonished me because I regularly commit the sin of Onan. His argument is that I should be storing my seed up to make God's babies. However, I have several jam jars full of the stuff in my fridge. Is the dirty beast correct, or have I got him on a technicality?

Regards,

N. Edmonds
Click to expand...

Leave your sister alone.
 
Tits McGee said:
I don't have a sister and am beginning to question if you're actually qualified to do this job. Mick, did you check Dev's credentials before allowing him to solicit such personal information on your website?
Click to expand...

I thought that's what you meant by the sin of Onan?

Please clarify which Sin you think you are guilty of, as it's not apparently a Deadly Sin you should be ok.
 
Dear Dev I like a clean bum so use baby whipes after a ****, it says on the packet don 't flush should i dispose of the soiled ones in the kitchen bin ?.
At the moment I'm still flushing them.
 
SUPERNORWICH 23 said:
Dear Dev I like a clean bum so use baby whipes after a ****, it says on the packet don 't flush should i dispose of the soiled ones in the kitchen bin ?.
At the moment I'm still flushing them.
Click to expand...

Do what I do and save them in a shoebox. Wash them on a quick cycle, rub a bar of carbolic soap over them whilst they are still moist and re-use.

I get 8-10 uses out of each one.
 
Dear Dev,

I took your advise but now have another problem:

I am a bachelor in my early 30s. I don’t share an apartment with a female because of my high moral standards, and I am not yet ready for marriage.

When I used to share an apartment with another bachelor, people assumed that we were gay.

I now have a very nice place of my own. However, if I have bachelor friends over, I am still perceived as being gay. And if I entertain a female friend, people say I am bisexual. (I just can’t seem to win!)

Why is it that a single man cannot have friends over for a simple card game or to watch TV without people thinking there’s something sexual going on?

I am straight, and I am sick of all this ugly talk. What can I do to stop this vicious gossip?

Finbarr
 
Dear Dev are China going to win the Asia cup ?
They are through to the quarter finals and playing great football .
The next game is against Australia .
 
Mick O'Toon said:
Dear Dev,

I took your advise but now have another problem:

I am a bachelor in my early 30s. I don’t share an apartment with a female because of my high moral standards, and I am not yet ready for marriage.

When I used to share an apartment with another bachelor, people assumed that we were gay.

I now have a very nice place of my own. However, if I have bachelor friends over, I am still perceived as being gay. And if I entertain a female friend, people say I am bisexual. (I just can’t seem to win!)

Why is it that a single man cannot have friends over for a simple card game or to watch TV without people thinking there’s something sexual going on?

I am straight, and I am sick of all this ugly talk. What can I do to stop this vicious gossip?

Finbarr
Click to expand...


Being Gay or being accused of being Gay is nothing to concern yourself over, as my Mother used to say "If they are talking about you then someone else is being left alone". Let them talk, at least you know you are all man.
 
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Mick O'Toon said:
Dear Dev,

I took your advise but now have another problem:

I am a bachelor in my early 30s. I don’t share an apartment with a female because of my high moral standards, and I am not yet ready for marriage.

When I used to share an apartment with another bachelor, people assumed that we were gay.

I now have a very nice place of my own. However, if I have bachelor friends over, I am still perceived as being gay. And if I entertain a female friend, people say I am bisexual. (I just can’t seem to win!)

Why is it that a single man cannot have friends over for a simple card game or to watch TV without people thinking there’s something sexual going on?

I am straight, and I am sick of all this ugly talk. What can I do to stop this vicious gossip?

Finbarr
Click to expand...

*advice
 
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dear devra,

I used to pretend to people I liked an american sport called WWE and I repeated it alot.
should i come clean about this terrible lie

regards
giant gaystacks
 
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