World Footy Watch

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Could be worse. Uruguay rather than any of the other South American teams. Italy are decent, but not world beaters and Costa Rica could have been worse. Not to say we'll get a point from any of them.
 
Soldado couldn't score in a cheap whore-house in Bangkok.
 
Joe hart to have his international career finally ended by conceding a long range goal agaisnt Costa Rica.
 
Not content with inventing Pot X to aid France, FIFA have also given them the easiest group.

Is it just me who thinks it's a coincidence that Switzerland (homeland of Sepp Blatter) and Frane (homeland of Michel Platini) are grouped together?

It's an absolute j-----------------------------------------------

*KIDNAPPED BY FIFA SECURITY*
 
I've lived and worked in rain forest. First things first, it takes you at least 14 days to get used to the humidity. turn up 3 or 4 days before the first match we will be ****ed. We must acclimatise. Secondly, any England defender who can break Sewage's leg the other side of next February deserves a place on the plane, even if it's JT. Thirdly don't kill ourselves, counter attacking footie is the name of the game, play like the away team with fast wingers/full backs Townsend, Walker, Oxlaide Chamberpot etc.

Finally make sure we get second in the group, first place means back to the rain forest for the last 16 match, second means playing near Rio.

PS Practice ****ing penalties.
 
Why don't they just seed everyone? (This is a multiple choice question)

A. It's important to keep natural rivals from playing each other in the group stage lest fans become enthusiastic.
B. It's important to muddy the waters with some bizarre complexity so you can fix the draw.
 
Not content with inventing Pot X to aid France, FIFA have also given them the easiest group.

Is it just me who thinks it's a coincidence that Switzerland (homeland of Sepp Blatter) and Frane (homeland of Michel Platini) are grouped together?

It's an absolute j-----------------------------------------------

*KIDNAPPED BY FIFA SECURITY*

France had an "easy" group in 2002, and they finished bottom.

Anyway, potential highlights:

Group A
Sandro and Paulinho kicking lumps out of Modric in the opening game
Dos Santos and BAE comparing notes on which Spurs managers they don't like
Mexico's fans to be far more entertaining than Brazil's

Group B
The likelihood of Sergio Ramos doing to a Dutch player what de Jong did to Xabi Alonso in the 2010 final
Chilean fans singing the unofficial second stanza of their anthem during Spain's anthem
Australia and Holland to both be subdued in their match, as they had to endure two of the most pieces of music ever written prior to kick-off

Group C
The first two sets of games being presented as "England's second-round opponents" - but not the final set of games
It being obvious nobody at the BBC read FIFA's dossier on every team during Japan's matches
Me screaming at the TV every time the commentators mispronounce the Japanese players' names

Group D
The inevitability of the camera panning down the entire Uruguayan team before the preamble to their anthem is done
Italy beating England comprehensively
Uruguay beating England comprehensively
The result of England vs Costa Rica being utterly irrelevant

Group E
France dropping points in one of their first two fixtures, and their squad having a collective nervous breakdown in the full glare of the media. Again.

Group F
Brazilian fans cheering when Messi misses an easy chance against Bosnia
Brazilian fans shutting up when Messi tonks in the next four chances against Bosnia
Brazilian fans trying not to admit they haven't produced a player on Messi's level for decades when he demolishes Iran

Group G
FIFA sparing viewers of any national anthems. Portugal and the USA have two of the worst national anthems ever composed, and Germany's isn't much better
The BBC still talking about Germany like the West German teams of the 70s, rather than any team since 2006
A lot of talk of Klinsmann vs Low before the USA vs Germany match, not much at half time when it's a tad one-sided

Group H
Commentators failing to identify a single Russian, South Korean or Algerian player at any point in the group stage
Russia losing all discipline in their final group game and having three players sent off
 
Thank god for that!

England's stay in the Finals is going to be extremely short, this time around, putting us all out of our misery early on.

Still, we might manage a couple of draws against Costa Rica, I suppose, to give the fans something to cheer about.
 
Hodgson endears himself to host city of first game:
"Earlier this week Hodgson described Manaus as "the place to avoid" because of the climate - temperatures reach 30C and humidity is about 80% "
Following Hodgson's initial comments, the mayor of Manaus, Arthur Virgilio, said England would not be welcome in the city.
Good start!!

Paraphrased from Beeb website article.
 
Hodgson endears himself to host city of first game:
"Earlier this week Hodgson described Manaus as "the place to avoid" because of the climate - temperatures reach 30C and humidity is about 80% "
Following Hodgson's initial comments, the mayor of Manaus, Arthur Virgilio, said England would not be welcome in the city.
Good start!!

Paraphrased from Beeb website article.

A bit rich from a Croydonian...
 
Group G
Portugal and the USA have two of the worst national anthems ever composed, and Germany's isn't much better

The US national anthem is not one of the worst ever composed. It's the worst, hands down. In its defense, it was meant to be awful. The tune comes from "To Anacreon in Heaven" a drinking song with a four octave range designed to make voices crack. Doesn't excuse our civic religion succeeding in having it played before every single sporting event. On the other hand I think Deutschland Úber Alles is rather nice.

The biggest fun for me is the question of whether one team can eliminate another an unprecedented (I think!) three times on the trot. Ghana knocked the US out of the 2006 and 2010 cups.

Why do I think England will play putrid football and somehow sneak through? Maybe because they've done it umpteen times in a row.
 
The US national anthem is not one of the worst ever composed. It's the worst, hands down. In its defense, it was meant to be awful. The tune comes from "To Anacreon in Heaven" a drinking song with a four octave range designed to make voices crack. Doesn't excuse our civic religion succeeding in having it played before every single sporting event. On the other hand I think Deutschland Úber Alles is rather nice.

The biggest fun for me is the question of whether one team can eliminate another an unprecedented (I think!) three times on the trot. Ghana knocked the US out of the 2006 and 2010 cups.

Why do I think England will play putrid football and somehow sneak through? Maybe because they've done it umpteen times in a row.

I agree the US anthem is a dirge , the German is rousing as is the French.
The British "God save" is awful , when there are so much better English anthems , Jerusalem, Land of hope Glory, To thee my country and Knees up
mother brown.
 
The US national anthem is not one of the worst ever composed. It's the worst, hands down.

It might be awful, but I can only associate it with victory. I dread to think how many times it's played at the Olympic games.
 
The US national anthem is not one of the worst ever composed. It's the worst, hands down. In its defense, it was meant to be awful. The tune comes from "To Anacreon in Heaven" a drinking song with a four octave range designed to make voices crack. Doesn't excuse our civic religion succeeding in having it played before every single sporting event. On the other hand I think Deutschland Úber Alles is rather nice.

The biggest fun for me is the question of whether one team can eliminate another an unprecedented (I think!) three times on the trot. Ghana knocked the US out of the 2006 and 2010 cups.

Why do I think England will play putrid football and somehow sneak through? Maybe because they've done it umpteen times in a row.

The anthem's called Deutschlandlied - and they only sing the third stanza, whilst "Deutschland, Deutschland über alles" is in the first stanza. Somebody thought that singing "Germany above all" would seem in poor taste in 1946. Besides, it has some ugly syllables in it, especially in the last couple of lines. It looks like half the stadium is dry heaving at that moment!

There are some truly awful anthems in the World Cup next year: Portugal, Netherlands, USA, England, Brazil, Australia and Switzerland seem to be having a private contest to see whose anthem can be the greatest dirge. That's the only logical reason I can think of for God Save The Queen having the exact same chords as the funeral march.

Befoe anyone asks, the best anthems at the World Cup are: Italy, Chile, Mexico, Japan, Argentina, Greece
 
The anthem's called Deutschlandlied - and they only sing the third stanza, whilst "Deutschland, Deutschland über alles" is in the first stanza. Somebody thought that singing "Germany above all" would seem in poor taste in 1946. Besides, it has some ugly syllables in it, especially in the last couple of lines. It looks like half the stadium is dry heaving at that moment!

There are some truly awful anthems in the World Cup next year: Portugal, Netherlands, USA, England, Brazil, Australia and Switzerland seem to be having a private contest to see whose anthem can be the greatest dirge. That's the only logical reason I can think of for God Save The Queen having the exact same chords as the funeral march.

Befoe anyone asks, the best anthems at the World Cup are: Italy, Chile, Mexico, Japan, Argentina, Greece

I like the French national anthem as well. I reckon its pretty rousing, especially when you consider that the translated lyrics include lines like 'let the blood of our foes water our furrows', I believe anyway.
 
I like the French national anthem as well. I reckon its pretty rousing, especially when you consider that the translated lyrics include lines like 'let the blood of our foes water our furrows', I believe anyway.

I always found the French anthem a bit too pompous, especially the ludicrous preamble (which is always skipped for sporting events) But it's for France, so that pompousness fits rather well!