interview

Have an interview with a south african investment company later today.any tips.i hate racists but not sure if i should let them no this

 

Break the ice by admitting that you can't wait for Nelson Mandela to die.

 

Take Bealey with you and punch him in the face. Job is yours.

 

I recommend you avoid using the term "blood diamond". And you'd probably be best not making any reference to principles or ethics - it would be bad manners to embaress them.

 

Don't go if the appointment is after dark.

 

Kick off with the Oscar Pistorius story that should get the interview up and running.....

 

I just hope the interview won't require you to write anything, otherwise you are ****ed, you left wing ****ebag! Good luck though.

 

I would learn how to command your own native language before engaging in international job search.

Your written English is terrible - I'm assuming you never hand-wrote your application?

 

That's pretty much what I said, get your own patter!

 

I wrote my comment about the same time you wrote yours!

Hadn't seen your comment until after I posted mine.

 

Yeah, I know, I was kidding, but, I still wouldn't be employing the **** to clean my shoes, with written English like that!

 

You are ****ed if you responded to the questions like this;

What is your favourite song?
Kiss Kiss Bang Bang

What is your favourite book?
The Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner

What is your favourite film
Lethal Weapon 3 (Diplomatic Immunity!)

What is your favourite item of clothing?
Running shoes

What was your pet's name?
Nig & Nog (goldfish)

If all that fails then just tell them you love rugby and the job is yours.

 

open with this

Roses Are Red
Violets are Glorious
Never Creep up on Oscar Pistorius

 

Bump

 

It was the same joke, monica

 

Hahahaha, I know mate, I was just saying that mine was better/funnier than yours!

 

How can it be when it was the same joke

My wording of it was superior to yours though.

 

And also, you posted on this thread before me and didn't make the joke, so at the back of your mind, you obviously remembered my hilarious joke when you saw the other thread and just copied it, hence, I win!

 

.

 

My joke had swearing/slagging left-wingers in it, which makes it funnier