Rival watch
- Thread starter Spurlock
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H
Hoddle is a god
Guest
Hoddle's attempt to become a pop idol was the most embarrassing I remember. Just because he looked the part didn't mean he could actually sing!
As much as I revere what the man did on the pitch, I couldn't possibly defend his failed singing career.
I don't know about cripples, but with a voice like that, he must have done some truly dreadful things in a previous life.
At least Hoddle restricted his dire musical output to one country... 
[video=youtube;CRuMoH0AXmM]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CRuMoH0AXmM[/video]
How he came 2nd in Marseille's Player of the Century poll after that is beyond me, in all honesty!
[video=youtube;CRuMoH0AXmM]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CRuMoH0AXmM[/video]
How he came 2nd in Marseille's Player of the Century poll after that is beyond me, in all honesty!
Much better than this sh .ite, poor Gazza, things haven't quite worked out for him the poor sod.
[video=youtube;T1urq4Vb0XM]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T1urq4Vb0XM[/video]
[video=youtube;T1urq4Vb0XM]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T1urq4Vb0XM[/video]
Much better than this sh .ite, poor Gazza, things haven't quite worked out for him the poor sod.
At the time there wasn't a better player and no supporter of any club would have not wanted him as part of their side ..... unless they're an idiot, oh - wait ....
He almost took England to the final of WC1990. He was something special. The opposition were terrified of him.
H
Hoddle is a god
Guest
"Arsenal fans have swamped a Facebook contest with votes to ensure Sol Campbell secures a spot in Tottenham's all-time Premier League XI."
(Source: BBC Football Gossip pages)
Talk about being completely obsessed!
(Source: BBC Football Gossip pages)
Talk about being completely obsessed!
"Arsenal fans have swamped a Facebook contest with votes to ensure Sol Campbell secures a spot in Tottenham's all-time Premier League XI."
(Source: BBC Football Gossip pages)
Talk about being completely obsessed!
Is that the Arsenal manager in your avatar Mr 'I'm not obsessed much' HIAG?
Too funny
H
Hoddle is a god
Guest
My avatar shows Adebayor and VDV (representing cherubs) laughing into the face of a disgruntled and "fallen" Whinger, whilst the god-like Hoddle looks on from above.
If this scene had been painted by Michelangelo it would be pronounced a work of genius.
Transfermarkt value him at £21m(!) and he's got two years left on his contract.
Meanwhile, Juve's offer of £8m for RVP was rejected out of hand. But there will be more, from Juve and others...
£8m for van Persie! That's just insulting. They may as well have slapped old Wenger round the chops with it.
That's just insulting. They may as well have slapped old Wenger round the chops with it.
£8m for van Persie!
That would be far more entertaining than the Bollympics.
Allardyce Hopes Ugly Football Will Bring Success
West Ham manager, Sam Allardyce has today confirmed that his newly promoted team will not be playing any attractive football next season...
Big Sam demonstrates some of the technical skills he wants his West Ham players to employ
In a surprising outburst at yesterday's pre-season press conference, the former Bolton, Blackburn and Newcastle manager was adamant that his team enjoy their dull and dreary brand of football. "I'm sick of people talking about the 'West Ham way'. This way has resulted in the club being relegated.
"Football should not be about entertainment. It should clearly be about analysing statistics and scoring more goals than the opposition. This fancy football with lots of passing and creativity has been brought over here by foreigners. We won't get caught up in it."
A club source explained some of the training sessions planned for the coming season. "Big Sam is a stickler for repetition. The players will take it in turns to hit 70-yard diagonal balls to the vague area of the opposition 18-yard box. This will be our main tactic next season so it's important we get it right.
"We will also be concentrating on headed flick-ons, shoulder barges, long-throws and long keeper clearances. Sam's statistics show that only one goal was scored via a simple pass last season so we simply don't see the relevance in practicing passes.
"We are also looking to sign Shola Ameobi from Newcastle. Big Sam loves the way the big lad can score with many different parts of the body and scoring ugly goals is one of our main aims for the coming season."
Fans of West Ham and local media recently criticised Allardyce for his statistical approach to the game, as well as his pronounced 'northerness'. "I went to an open training session last season and it was a total farce," said lifelong Hammer, 'Cross-Eyed' Chris Coulson.
"There was Sam, on his laptop playing Football Manager while his coaches took training. It was a farce! They were practicing their cross-field diagonal passes and at one point ran out of balls - they were all in surrounding gardens. When Kevin Nolan had to knock on doors, asking if he could have his ball back, it really was a new low for us.
"I think Sam has been using Football Manager to test his tactics. It's completely ridiculous and makes us the laughing stock of English football. He was using FM2010 - what a joke! As soon as he started drinking bitter and shouting 'hey up' I left."
The West Ham United board also confirmed that the players have been watching DVDs of Stoke City for inspiration.
West Ham manager, Sam Allardyce has today confirmed that his newly promoted team will not be playing any attractive football next season...
Big Sam demonstrates some of the technical skills he wants his West Ham players to employ
You must log in or register to see images
In a surprising outburst at yesterday's pre-season press conference, the former Bolton, Blackburn and Newcastle manager was adamant that his team enjoy their dull and dreary brand of football. "I'm sick of people talking about the 'West Ham way'. This way has resulted in the club being relegated.
"Football should not be about entertainment. It should clearly be about analysing statistics and scoring more goals than the opposition. This fancy football with lots of passing and creativity has been brought over here by foreigners. We won't get caught up in it."
A club source explained some of the training sessions planned for the coming season. "Big Sam is a stickler for repetition. The players will take it in turns to hit 70-yard diagonal balls to the vague area of the opposition 18-yard box. This will be our main tactic next season so it's important we get it right.
"We will also be concentrating on headed flick-ons, shoulder barges, long-throws and long keeper clearances. Sam's statistics show that only one goal was scored via a simple pass last season so we simply don't see the relevance in practicing passes.
"We are also looking to sign Shola Ameobi from Newcastle. Big Sam loves the way the big lad can score with many different parts of the body and scoring ugly goals is one of our main aims for the coming season."
Fans of West Ham and local media recently criticised Allardyce for his statistical approach to the game, as well as his pronounced 'northerness'. "I went to an open training session last season and it was a total farce," said lifelong Hammer, 'Cross-Eyed' Chris Coulson.
"There was Sam, on his laptop playing Football Manager while his coaches took training. It was a farce! They were practicing their cross-field diagonal passes and at one point ran out of balls - they were all in surrounding gardens. When Kevin Nolan had to knock on doors, asking if he could have his ball back, it really was a new low for us.
"I think Sam has been using Football Manager to test his tactics. It's completely ridiculous and makes us the laughing stock of English football. He was using FM2010 - what a joke! As soon as he started drinking bitter and shouting 'hey up' I left."
The West Ham United board also confirmed that the players have been watching DVDs of Stoke City for inspiration.
H
Hoddle is a god
Guest
Arsenal to be Renamed 'North London United.'
Arsenal are facing a lengthy court battle after the Office of Fair Trading launched a probe into the North London giants.
It has been claimed that due to the lack of striking power within the team, the word 'Arsenal' misrepresents the club as a team of 'big guns' and may be fooling fans into supporting the club and buying expensive season tickets. The move comes after a record 38,000 complaints were received by Trading Standards. Arsenal now have 28 days to answer a formal charge.
A club spokesman was incensed by the news. "Arsenal Football Club plan to fight this charge with the utmost vigour. Yes, Bendtner can't hit a barn door and yes, Chamak'h has been a massive waste of money, but we have van Persie playing 12 league games a season for goodness sake! The average height of our first team is 5 feet 4 and we agree that needs addressing, but great things come in small packages.
"Arshavin is a great player, he's just a bit small and can't see over the heads of opposition defenders, especially for set pieces. We play sexy, flowing football, the fact we don't win anything is completely irrelevant."
Understandably, Arsenal's rivals, Tottenham Hotspur, are delighted by the news. "Arsenal sell a lot of season tickets because of their name, a Spurs spokesperson said. "It suggests guns, firing on all cylinders and destruction. Well, Arsenal were toothless last season and we believe many of the floating fans will come to White Hart Lane after a name change.
"We have suggested to the Office of Fair Trading that the club should be renamed, 'North London United.' It's accurate and and concise."
The majority of complaints originated from North London, prompting conspiracy theories; a suggestion completely refuted by Graham Saunders, editor of Tottenham fanzine, '**** Off Back to South London Arsenal'. "Look, we simply believe that Arsenal fans are scumbags, we don't get involved in politics. We have never organised concerted campaigns on social media, local press or fans forums to get Arsenal investigated.
"We believe that Arsenal belong in South London and have been stealing our fans for many years. Anything that makes them **** off back to south London has to be a good thing."
We will keep you up to date on the case and Arsenal's plans to fight the court action. Unless they do what they usually do, move address, leaving whoever to answer the phone and say "nah, sorry, they're not here anymore, they've gone."
Arsenal are facing a lengthy court battle after the Office of Fair Trading launched a probe into the North London giants.
It has been claimed that due to the lack of striking power within the team, the word 'Arsenal' misrepresents the club as a team of 'big guns' and may be fooling fans into supporting the club and buying expensive season tickets. The move comes after a record 38,000 complaints were received by Trading Standards. Arsenal now have 28 days to answer a formal charge.
A club spokesman was incensed by the news. "Arsenal Football Club plan to fight this charge with the utmost vigour. Yes, Bendtner can't hit a barn door and yes, Chamak'h has been a massive waste of money, but we have van Persie playing 12 league games a season for goodness sake! The average height of our first team is 5 feet 4 and we agree that needs addressing, but great things come in small packages.
"Arshavin is a great player, he's just a bit small and can't see over the heads of opposition defenders, especially for set pieces. We play sexy, flowing football, the fact we don't win anything is completely irrelevant."
Understandably, Arsenal's rivals, Tottenham Hotspur, are delighted by the news. "Arsenal sell a lot of season tickets because of their name, a Spurs spokesperson said. "It suggests guns, firing on all cylinders and destruction. Well, Arsenal were toothless last season and we believe many of the floating fans will come to White Hart Lane after a name change.
"We have suggested to the Office of Fair Trading that the club should be renamed, 'North London United.' It's accurate and and concise."
The majority of complaints originated from North London, prompting conspiracy theories; a suggestion completely refuted by Graham Saunders, editor of Tottenham fanzine, '**** Off Back to South London Arsenal'. "Look, we simply believe that Arsenal fans are scumbags, we don't get involved in politics. We have never organised concerted campaigns on social media, local press or fans forums to get Arsenal investigated.
"We believe that Arsenal belong in South London and have been stealing our fans for many years. Anything that makes them **** off back to south London has to be a good thing."
We will keep you up to date on the case and Arsenal's plans to fight the court action. Unless they do what they usually do, move address, leaving whoever to answer the phone and say "nah, sorry, they're not here anymore, they've gone."
Surely they'd need to be renamed North London United so people won't have to change their name on Pro Evo every single year?